Season 3 Arcana

Bloodlines
3.01 “Bad Blood”
3.02 “Beautifully Broken”
3.03 “It Hurts Me Too”
3.04 “9 Crimes”
3.05 “Trouble”
3.06 “I Got a Right to Sing the Blues”
3.07 “Hitting the Ground”
3.08 “Night on the Sun”
3.09 “Everything is Broken”
3.10 “I Smell a Rat”
3.11 “Fresh Blood”
3.12 “Evil is Going On”

Bloodlines
Transcribed by Renée

Episode 1 “Bad Blood”
Transcribed by Anna

Sam in car
FLASHBACK – How Sam got the note with his parent’s name

Outside the French Restaurant
ANDY – Sookie Stackhouse is a lot of things, she’s stubborn, she’s bossy and she’s bat-shit weird but she ain’t stupid. Unfortunately for her the bossy and the bat-shitpart don’t work so well with law enforcement. Now technically Kenya did follow protocol, you can’t file a missing person’s report for 48 hours but Sookie was right,there were signs of force in that restaurant and Kenya could’ve done more. But hell, police work’s about making choices and when what you’re looking at is a pain in thearse telepath and a jilted vampire ain’t nobody goin’ to blame you for walking theother way.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – I got all kinds of thoughts running through my mind right now but the loudest one is FUCK. All good cops at some time or another are faced with a cover-up situation. This is my time FUCK.
FYI – Arlene was engaged to Rene Lanier (aka Drew Marshall) less than a couple ofmonths ago.

Bill’s house
FLASHBACK – How Jessica met Hank
FLASHBACK – How Bill picked out Sookie’s ring

Bill in car with the crew
THE FUCK YOU CREW is a group of werewolves with a penchant for big motorcycles and vampire blood. They are employed by a powerful vampire who supplies them with V as a means to keep them loyal and compliant.

Jason’s house
FLASHBACK –The last time Jason was in jail and talking to Rene
ANDY – I believe whole heartedly that man, even the weakest of men, at any time in his life can look in the mirror, hate the guy looking back at him and choose to change. But there is also one time in life when a man should not turn over a new leaf. That would be the night he commits second degree murder. If Stackhouse starts doing anything out of the ordinary like reading the newspaper, or chewing with his mouth closed, or remembering girls’ names the morning after, anything that shows that he cares about anything outside himself, we will be fucked.

Fangtasia
FLASHBACK How Eric met Yvetta
JESSICA – I don’t really think of Eric in that way, um, because I love Hoyt and because Eric’s kind of an asshole but I guess I can sort of see why girls are into him.
HINT – A vampire sheriff is a governing overseer who acts as a governor, mayor, and police sheriff combined. The sheriff is responsible for the safety and protection of all the vampires in his or her area. A missing vampire is not only reason for concern in and of itself (like any missing person would be), but it also suggests a potentially greater threat to the stability and sanctity of the area.
FLASHBACK – When Sookie and Eric negotiated payment for the trip to Dallas

Bill in car
FYI -The guy holding Bill took off his gloves, which Bill uses to remove the silver from around his neck.

Jessica waking at Bill’s
JESSICA – When I was made vampire Bill told me I’d have all kinds of impulses that I’d never had before and that’s totally true. Suddenly I wanted to rip out people’s throats and have like sex with everything that walked. But this feeling isn’t like that at all; it’s like a chill.

Sookie’s
ANDY – Now everybody knows I’m sober again. I’m not condoning it, but tequila and chlozapine is not the worst idea Lafayette ever had. Let’s just leave it at that. Floaty, that’s a nice place.
FLASHBACK – When Sookie helped Eggs remember the things he had done.

Fangtasia
HINT – Eric is on the phone with Mr. Ruben, one of his many well-connected vampire minions. Like a mafia boss, Eric has vampires who are always taking care of his dirty work, so he cannot be implicated.

Sam in hotel room
FLASHBACK – See other people who have had similar dreams after ingesting vampire blood (Sookie and Lafayette talk about dreaming of Eric.)
ANDY – Whether it’s Bon Temps or Magnolia or Bumfuck, Texas, all small towns live or die by one code – protect your own. I don’t know this Audrey Fisher character, but she’s either foreign, bad people, or she’s got a score to settle with those Mickens. No matter the reason, you sell out the people in your town you’ve got as much moral fibre as big city folks, and that ain’t a compliment.

Lafayette’s
ANDY – I may get a little belligerent when I’m drunk, and I may get stupid, but Lettie Mae Thornton’s pretty much the meanest drunk I’ve ever seen. Back in the mid 90s she worked at a pet store for a spell. She brought home a kitten one night for Tara but when the thing pooped in the house, she got in her car loaded up on whisky and ran over the poor little thing while Tara cried. People always ask why a smart girl like Tara gets herself into so many bad situations. Well, after a childhood like that, is it any wonder?

Sheriff’s office
FYI – Missing person reports can be filed by anyone online anytime. But it usually takes between 24-48 hours for the police to take a report seriously. As Kenya and Bud’s attitude demonstrate. The same rules apply in Bon Temps.
ANDY – Bud Dearborn was a good cop once: fair, decent, level headed. He could sniff out trouble from three parishes over. He used to never have a hunch that wasn’t right, but these days he’s tired and cranky, and that level-headedness has turned into I-don’t-give-a-damn and that nose for trouble’s turned into everyone’s-guilty-of-something-so-why-even-bother. Then you throw vampires into the mix; it’s like trying to teach my grandmamma how to send an email – not interested. Sookie shouldn’t take it personal; Bud’s just reached his limit. I’m just glad he’s found a hankering for square dancing. That’s what feeds his soul these days.

Cornejo Tires
TOMMY MICKENS – I’m good with cars, always have been. I can get into small spaces and make magic happen. Do I think my future’s about climbing up the ladder at Cornejo Tires? Hell no! But I got a side job, and they’re cool about letting me take care of it, so I’m good for now.

Lafayette’s
REV. AVERY DANIELS was born to a proper middle-class family in Biloxi, Mississippi. He came to Bon Temps after an extended stay at the First Baptists Church of Lumberton, where rumor has it, he was more than a spiritual advisor to some of the women in his congregation.

Bill in ground
FYI – When vampires cannot find a light-tight place to sleep, they burrow into the dirt.

Bill’s
HINT – Hank died when Jessica was talking to Sookie. By the time she returned to him, he was dead for too long for her blood to revive or turn him.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – Badass super powers couldn’t make that boy a badass, much less a lameass hair cut. If Hoyt Fortenberry is a badass then I’m fucking Bruce Willis. I mean I am Bruce Willis, not I’m fuck…never mind.

Fangtasia
HINT – Other Louisiana sheriffs have reported an up tick in the use of vampire blood by humans. However, no one seems to know which vampire is the source of the blood. If a vampire had been reported missing, it would stand to reason that he or she had been kidnapped by humans and was being drained. Without a missing vampire, it suggests that a vampire is willingly providing his or her blood.

Merlotte’s
MISSY FINE & JEN BULLARD first met in freshman biology, when they bonded over a shared interest in Bonobo monkeys. They became roommates shortly after and shared everything from clothes and shoes to homework and boys. Missy hails from Greenwich, Connecticut; while Jen is a native of the Bronx. Neither has been west of the Mississippi.

Fangtasia
JESSICA – That guy’s an asshole. He’s the one who made Bill turn me into a vampire, and he’s stricter than my daddy. Even his punishments are way meaner. I don’t know even where he gets his power from. Is he elected like the president or something? I mean if he is, I am so not voting for him. All I know is everybody’s afraid of him, even Eric. Eric’s afraid of no one.
HINT – Sophie Anne dominates Eric because she outranks him in the vampire hierarchy. Although Eric is much older and could physically overpower Sophie Anne, he lets her rough him up out of reluctant deference.
JESSICA – I didn’t even know we had a queen, but she is seriously badass. Almost every vampire I’ve ever met is afraid of Eric, and she just, like, put him in his place for good. Go red-head.

Sookie’s – Pam & Sookie
HINT – Notice the chill Pam feels when Eric calls her.

Merlotte’s – Terry & Arlene
ANDY – Ever since Terry got back from Iraq, I hoped that he’d find himself a lady friend to make the world an easier place. I never thought of Arlene as being that kind of lady, but then when you see those two together, somethin’ about it just works. It’s like the blind leading the blind, but they’re both okay with running into the wall.

Merlotte’s – Pam & Lafayette
PAMELA SWYNFORD DE BEAUFORT (born 1871) was the daughter of a wealthy London businessman and his peerage wife, who groomed her to be a respectable young lady of society, which bored her no end. She accepted marriage proposals in the hopes that pre-marital sex would be part of the arrangement. To Pam’s dismay, her title and dowry were so coveted, none of her suitors would succumb to her advances for fearing of taking her virginity and sabotaging the union. Pam took matters into her own hands when she broke off several engagements, moved to Paris, and opened a high-end brothel in the Spanish Quarter. She felt the only thing better than having a steady stream of lovers was getting paid to do so. But once she was turned, she figured out what being a liberated woman really meant.

Bill’s – Jessica & Sookie
FYI – When a maker “calls” his or her progeny, it always registers as an aggressive chill that runs through the progeny’s body. Calling one’s progeny is a useful tool when a maker is in danger. Some makers avoid using the call too frequently, so their progeny knows when there is a true emergency. Others use it at their leisure.

Bill at Olivia’s house
FYI – When a vampire is drained of much of his or her blood, he or she becomes very weak, much like a human when starving. The need for survival is so intense that their more animalistic, primitive side might win out, which may in turn lead to draining a human to death.

Lafayette’s
HINT – Lettie Mae is hugging the Reverend a little closely.
ANDY – I consider myself a Christian God-fearing man but I’ve seen enough of how people treat each other to know that no minister or priest can keep people from doing bad things to each other. And Lettie Mae may think God’s on her side now that she’s off the bottle, but I personally expect to be seeing pigs fly before I see her being a good mother to that girl.

Jason’s house-With Missy & Jen
ANDY – See that, you can be damn sure Jason would be sitting at home crying and shaking if I hadn’t put the fear of God in him last night. Now that right there is some good God damn police work on my part, if I do say so myself. Bud may have a nose for crime, but I got a knack for covering it up, and Jason Stackhouse does have a knack for talking pretty girls into doing just about everything he wants them to do.

Olivia’s house
FYI – Bill has tried his best to maintain a monogamous feeding relationship withSookie. Most vampires find this difficult to uphold, but Bill’s self-control is one of his traits that sets him apart from other vampires.
FYI – Note the sounds of howling wolves and Bill’s reaction.

Lafayette’s
FYI – Tara ingested a bottle Oxycontin, an opiate analgesic, which is prescribed for severe pain. It functions to change the way in which the nervous system and the brain respond to pain. It can be very addictive and very dangerous when taken in large, unprescribed doses.

Car wreck
JESSICA – We had a Catahoula leopard dog when I was a kid, before my dad decided he was too playful and distracted me from more Bible study. But once, when we were on a walk in the woods and that dog saw a dead bird in a pond, he jumped in, swam to it, grabbed on to it, swam back, and dropped it at my feet. That dumb dog didn’t have any idea what it was doing. It was like he was on a remote control, and that was me finding Bill’s car. I know I just compared myself to a dog, but I just can’t really think of any better way to explain it.
FYI – The Wolfsangel, which is German for “wolf’s hook,” has been used throughout history. The image itself is taken from an ancient Runic symbol which, during the Viking era, was used as a means to keep away wolves. Later, the symbol was used by Hitler’s “Das Reich” unit of the SS. The “odal-rune” and the “eif-rune” are both old Runic symbols. Runic symbols are letters of an ancient Germanic alphabet, related to the Roman alphabet.
FYI – Wolves naturally align themselves into groups of 3-7 in order to stabilize themselves and procure food for survival. An Alpha male or female leads the pack, followed by the Beta, down to the weakest or bottom of the pack, the Omega. In order to sustain pack survival, a Beta may mate with the Alpha female if the Alpha male dies.

Episode 2 “Beautifully Broken”
Transcribed by Anna

Bill + Werewolves
FYI – Notice that these wolves have glowing eyes.
RUSSELL EDGINGTON – The Vampire King of Mississippi is rumored to have been born around 700BC, to the Celtic name Kurun, but no one knows how he was made vampire or by whom.
COOTER JOHNSON a.k.a. “Coot” was born in Yazoo County, Mississippi, in 1972 to parents Loretta and Duke. Loretta died during childbirth and Duke named Coot “for killing his mama on the way out.” Whether this created Coot’s rage problem or merely added to a pre-existing condition will never be known. What is known is that Coot always hated the weak and systematically preyed on them, whether in the schoolyard or backyard. He served his first stint in juvie for assault at the age of nine. By the age of eleven, despite a rough and tumble childhood, he’d grown into a lady-killer. In fact, his way with women was his one saving grace. Every time he was on the brink of self-destruction, some sorry gal came to his rescue. He’s been breaking hearts and bones ever since.
JESSICA – So every state has its own vampire king or queen? I bet they live in like crazy palaces with guards and servants who serve fancy blood and they probably have like a million cubby holes they can chose from, not the same stink fest of a hole that I’ve got to share with a dead guy.

Lafayette’s
ANDY – After all everyone did to save Tara from that Maryann mess, Tara’s a damn fool to try and throw her life away. We all got problems; we all lose people we care about. My daddy died for his country, my momma ran off with a Yankee race car driver. Yeah what happened with Eggs, I know that’s gotta hurt like hell, but taking a bunch of pills to end your life, it’s selfish is what it is. She’s got plenty of people who care about her. Lafayette would walk through fire for her. There’s plenty of people who can’t say that.

Fangtasia
FYI – Eric is familiar with Operation Werewolf, which was a last-ditch Nazi plan developed during the final stages of the Second World War. Its mission was to create a German commando force that would operate behind enemy lines as the allies advanced through Germany.
JESSICA – See, yet another thing Bill hasn’t told me. Werewolves exist. Great! Awesome! Anyone else have any idea how to fight ‘em because I sure as hell don’t, and I’ll bet anything if they’re near Bon Temps, they’re going to find a way to Bon Temps.
JESSICA – I started thinking about all those things Bill hasn’t taught me yet, like how to fly, what other supernatural creatures are out there, and about a billion and one other things about vampire history and politics. Oh yeah, and how not to kill someone when your feeding on him, hence why I had to ask Pam of all people, and I know she hates me. I don’t even know all the things I don’t know yet. It seems like every time I turn around someone is telling me something about myself that I had no idea about. I’m going to feel all sorts of bad if something terrible’s happened to Bill, but maybe it’s just my homeschool self rearing its ugly head, but would it kill him to just–I don’t know–stay home once in a while and teach me something?

HINT – Werewolves are not mainstreaming like vampires are. They keep their identities secret from humans in order to protect themselves.

Eric & Godric flashback
FYI – Eric and Godric are posing as S.S. during WWII.

Russell’s mansion
TALBOT ANGELIS was born in Corfu, Greece, made vampire in the 13th century. He met his future husband, Russell Edgington, at a costume ball in Constantinople, and the two embarked on a heated romance that went on a brief hiatus in the 1700s, when the two split and Talbot went back to his hometown. After fighting for Greek independence in the 1820s, Talbot suffered an existential crisis and realised the only thing that mattered to him anymore was Russell, so he went to Germany where Russell had been living, to reunite with the love of his life.
FYI – Countess Elizabeth Bathory de Ecsed was born August 17, 1560 and died August 21, 1614. While many accounts label her as a serial killer, hard evidence to support this theory is difficult to pin down. She is also known as the “Blood Countess” and “Countess Dracula.”
HINT – The silver door was an anniversary gift from Russell 112 years ago.

Tara & Lafayette in car
HINT – Lafayette grew up listening to Herbie Hancock, and when he stumbled upon his encyclopaedia entry at the age of 16, he discovered the musician was a Buddhist. Lafayette smoked a joint, hunkered down with the Mahayana Sutra and has been fascinated by the religion ever since, finding ways to incorporate it into his own spirituality.

Bill’s
JESSICA – Hoyt is the sweetest man in the world and at first I felt like the luckiest girl that he liked me. But now that I know what I’m capable of, all the horrible bloody things I can do and like doing, I know he’s too good for me. I’ll only end up hurting him or maybe even worse he’ll find out how awful I can be and he’ll reject me. I don’t think I could ever get over that. No, no, I got to do it first; I have to tell him we’re not right for each other before he finds out for himself.
JESSICA – I’ve never known gross until this cubby. It was never my favourite place to begin with. It is Bill’s after all, and vampire or not, how weird is it to sleep in someone else’s bed you hardly know, even if he did make you? I’d give anything if I could push back the clock and make things different, you know, back to when I didn’t kill this guy and I could just climb into bed with Hoyt instead of this rank hole.

Sookie’s
ANDY – They just don’t make them like Adele Stackhouse anymore. Sure she was always shoving something in your face to eat, made me gain probably 10 pounds off her lemon meringue pie alone. She was awfully good to Jason and Sookie, and they were never the most normal of folks to look after. Man all you got to do is take one look at my grandmamma to realise Adele was one in a million.
HINT – Jason seems open to the idea that other creatures, mythological or otherwise, do, in fact, exist.
FLASHBACK – See how good Sookie’s  impression of Bill really is.

The Mickenses’
HINT – Note that Tommy calls Joe Lee by his first name and not “Dad.”
FLASHBACK – See why Melinda might be familiar with the name Merlotte.  (Sam being told by his adoptive mom that the Mickens are bad people.)
TOMMY – If Sam thinks he’s going to have some sweet family reunion with hugs and tears like they do on Oprah or Doctor Phil, he’s got another thing coming. Momma may act like she wants him here, but I give Joe Lee about 10 minutes before he’s either kicking him out or finding a way to make a fast buck off him.

Merlotte’s
HINT  – Note the brand on the werewolf. How do the weres get their brands?
ANDY – God Lord! The last thing we need in this town is another weird creature roaming round the woods, first vampires, then Sam Merlotte and now this. I know Terry’s all messed in his head, but one thing I’ll give him, he does know how to track an enemy down. So if  even he’s seeing something suspicious, there’s probably something worth worrying about…Just so long as it’s no God-damn maenad.

Meadowglade
ANDY – Hell, half this town should probably be at least in some kind of out-patient program, ‘specially after all that craziness with Maryann and people going nuts around meat statues. There are times I’d even like to check myself into a loony bin after hearing my sister Portia go off yammering about this or that.
JESUS VELASQUEZ tried a variety of jobs before he settled into nursing, and his natural healing instincts made it an immediate fit. He has been an employee of Meadowglade for several years now.
ANDY – Truth is I never met Lafayette’s mamma Ruby Jean; I know of her. I only found out he even had a momma back when he went missing on his supposed ‘gay cruise’ but there was no record of where she’d been living. I tell you what, as out there as Lafayette can get–hell that boy is out there–he keeps some things in his life locked up tight.

Outside sheriff’s office
ANDY – Never thought I had the face for television, but hell if someone hands you fifteen minutes, you’re an idiot not to take them. Right? Course it’d be nice if it was something I actually did…or something I did right. Tell you what does make me feel better, though, that cute reporter Sandy, and it ain’t just the good Irish stock she comes from. She’s got that thing some girl’s just seem to have like Sarah Palin. There’s a twinkle there, real twinkle.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – Part of the whole problem with having vampires in this world is how we goin’ to fight a bunch of already dead people with more strength than the guns we got. Next thing you know they’ll be bringing those vampire sheriffs into Bon Temps, and we’ll be nothing but juice dispensers to ‘em. You can’t make outlaws the law. That’d just be…well, chaos. There’s only one sheriff in town and that’s Bud Dearborn and ain’t no person or non-person is ever goin’ to get in the way of that.

The Mickenses’
TOMMY – Look, everybody’s got a sob story. People in this sorry-ass town, they’re a dime a dozen. Sam thinks somehow by being left he got the raw deal, but Joe Lee didn’t stop being the criminal the day he got out of jail, he just stopped getting caught. Sam’ll learn soon enough, he got lucky when he got away from these folks.
HINT – The shifter gene is recessive, so if a shifter mates with a human, their offspring will not necessarily be a shifter.

Meadowglade
ANDY – More I think on it, Lettie Mae was always rambling about her sister and how they used to be the toast of the town, but all I ever saw was Lettie Mae toasted. So my guess is, if Ruby Jean’s anything like her sister, she’s probably better off far, far, away from here.

The Mickenses’
TOMMY – First time I shifted, it was into a pit bull just like Ranger. Ranger’s my first dog, and I loved him something awful. So when the full moon hit and I started feeling the, the need to run creeping up on me, I just turned right into a pit just like Ranger, and we ran together like all hell into the night. I knew it was coming. Mamma had warned me about it, but she never told me how awesome it would feel to be running and free like that.
HINT – Notice Tommy’s scars.

Bill’s
JESSICA – Pam told me that a real vampire never exposes her secrets. She also tried to tell me the same thing or two about being a good lover, but I just tuned that part out. Totally gross. All I’ll say is that her advice is based on the same principle that you can’t be blamed for something you didn’t do or people didn’t know you did. In other words you can’t miss what was never there in the first place.

Russell’s
HINT – Although chilled carbonated blood is quite simple to make, it requires special equipment, The Vampire Blood Soda Syphon 6000. Older models exist, but none work as well. Simply pour chilled blood into the syphon, load the CO2 cartridge, and shake it up! Nota bene: The blood must be chilled before it goes into the soda syphon. The colder the blood, the more carbonated it will be.
JESSICA – Aside from Tru Blood tasting like ass, it really sucks missing human food. There’re about a hundred foods I would just die to have made from blood. Ice cream for one and taquitos, ginger snaps, um, oh, and Fig Newtons, pie…any kind of pie.  I know you’re supposed to get used to missing food in time so much so you barely even remember it let alone crave it, but right now, I’d kill for some blood bacon.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – I care about my job. I care about doing things right. I care about the people in this town. I’m a good cop. Trouble is the way things have been coming down lately, I haven’t always looked like one, and I don’t need no trophies or attaboys or nothing, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t feel good to have the people genuinely believing I’m good at my job, for more than two minutes anyway. Now if only Jason can keep his damn mouth shut, this town can go back to believing I’m a damn good cop, which I am!

Sam & Tommy in the woods
HINT – Tommy and Sam both shift into dogs because that’s the animal they imprinted on. Dogs are their “go to” shift.
TOMMY – People use that expression all the time, er “burned into my memory.” That’s pretty much what imprinting is–when you look at something that’s alive, really focus on it so you seen it, felt it in your bones, then as a shape shifter you can become it. The first time doing a new animal it can take a hell of a lot of concentration but once you done it, you can always turn into it–kinda like this bizarre zoo library stuck in your brain forever. You gotta be careful though. I shifted into a squirrel once. Almost got eaten by a coyote. but then I shifted into him and basically kicked his ass. Freaked him the fuck out.

Bill’s
FLASHBACK – See why Earl and Sookie’s names are circled. (Gran explaining to Sookie that Earl was also telepathic)

Sookie’s
FYI – Because Sookie has had Eric’s blood, he can sense her fear.
FYI – The symbol for “Operation Werewolf” is thought to be Runic in origin. The ancient Runic alphabet used letters known as Runes and was the predecessor to the Germanic alphabets before the Latin alphabet was adopted.
HINT – Eric seems very interested in Sookie’s safety.

Russell’s
HINT – Talbot had his chef boil the blood with hand-picked rose petals for eleven hours. It was then strained through cheesecloth to ensure its velvety texture.
JESSICA – When it comes to vampire politics I know squat. Thanks, Bill, super helpful as usual, but here’s what I’m guessing. It’s just like the books on European history mama would teach us from while all our other friends were going to real school with real teachers. The biggest badass with the least conscience about getting rid of whoever’s in their way usually wins.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – My grammama and my sister Portia always give me grief about my unrefined palate, but you won’t ever find me in any new restaurant or some fancy kitchen store looking for things that puree stuff. I don’t have a rat’s ass idea what it is to julienne anything. Merlotte’s is just fine by me, and Terry ain’t no Lafayette, but he’s still a damn good chef. So if Arlene’s puking her guts out, I’ll go 10 to 1 it ain’t Terry’s cooking.
FRANKLIN MOTT made vampire in 1954, was the son of a successful surgeon and a brother to one of the most noted scholars in the world. Franklin, on the other hand, was always behind the eight-ball, emotionally and intellectually, and he struggled with being an underachiever in a family of noted scientists and scholars. Throughout most of his adolescence, he was clueless socially, scholastically and felt he was a failure. He left home at 16, determined to make his mark on the world. He started his own private investigation business, focussed on developing his skills and abilities to be as thorough as possible in his cases. He was made vampire by a client who could not afford to pay him. Instead, Franklin accepted the gift of eternal life, convinced the years of experience would make up for his shortcomings as a human being, and he succeeded. Russell snapped him up when he got wind of his skills. But while his years of hard work helped him develop his abilities as a P.I., no time in the world could make Franklin understand how to carry on a romantic relationship with any degree of aplomb.
HINT – We’ve seen these boots before.
ANDY – I ain’t never been with Stackhouse for more than 10 minutes where we didn’t get roped into some kinda trouble. So you can see why I would be a little hesitant to say, “Hey! Why don’t you come along while I go do an important part of my job,” but the only thing worse than being with Stackhouse is leaving him alone to his drunken devices.
ANDY – Woman’s been working here what, 5 years and she can’t get the stinking code right. Sure Rosie’s cute an all, but if you ask me, taking a break from filing your nails to actually filing something now and again might be a better use of your time.

Hotshot
CALVIN NORRIS is the established leader of Hotshot, a close knit community just on the outskirts of Bon Temps. He guards the population, very closely, leaving much of Hotshot a mystery to the outside world.

Merlotte’s
SHANE AND CHRIS. If ever there were two perfect examples of “redneck trash,” Shane and Chris would be just that. It takes an awful lot to fail middle school, but these boys managed to find a way after burning their science teacher’s lab down with cigarettes and a Bunsen burner. It’s safe to say they don’t have a single friend in Bon Temps – except for each other of course.

Russell’s
HINT – Freezing blood is a time-consuming and delicate process that requires special gelato makers Talbot had flown in from Rome. To make the custard, thinned blood must be simmered in a large saucepan over a medium heat. When the liquid starts to thicken, whisk it over very low heat. Cover and chill overnight or transfer contents of saucepan into glassware and chill in an ice bath. Then the contents must be placed in the special blood gelato makers and left to the machine’s devices. If one does not have access to such appliances, blood gelato is nearly impossible to make.
HINT – See the last time Bill saw Lorena. (In Dallas)

Sookie’s
JESSICA – Look I’m not saying he’s not cute ‘n all, but Eric ain’t my type. First of all, the age thing doesn’t really turn me on. So what, you can speak twenty languages and you were around when cheese was invented, big deal. I’ll take a sweet big-hearted boy like Hoyt over super-tall and Viking cool any day. That’s it. I’m not denying there’s some, well, heat between Sookie and Eric, but seeing as how I’m Team Bill, that’s saying something.

Episode 3 “It Hurts Me Too”
Transcribed by Renée

Sookie’s
HINT – Eric took that bullet to prevent the werewolf from dying. Eric wants information from the werewolf for his own purposes.

The Palace
FYI – Lord of Glyndyfrdy (1359-1416) was best know for beginning a lengthy, failed revolt against the ruler of Wales in 1400. He was also the last native Welshman to be titled “Prince of Wales.”
FYI – Fire can kill a vampire; fortunately Lorena’s fire was able to be put out. Liam, Diane, and Malcolm had no such luck in their vampire-nest fire. They were trapped inside, and it was daylight outside.
JESSICA – Bill doesn’t tell me a lot about his personal life, which is fine because I already know way more than I wanted to about his and Sookie’s sex life. I do not understand why houses have to have such thin walls, but, anyway…Sookie filled me in on a couple of things that happened while they were in Dallas, and it sounds like Bill’s maker, Lorena, is a super bitch. Even though she, like, released Bill, she totally stalks him. [Shrugs.] But she’s really pretty.
HINT – Why does Bill say it is impossible for Sookie to be turned into a vampire?

Bon Temps Cemetary
FLASHBACK – The last time Sookie saved Eric from bullets

The Motel
JESSICA – Because I was a virgin before I became a vampire, the only thing I knew about sex was what I learned from Becky Eubanks, who used to let boys finger her…in church. I cannot tell you how much that didn’t prepare me for a real sex life or real live vampire sex. I’m too shy to talk about my own with Hoyt, but I will say that we don’t make the same noises that come out of Tara and Franklin. Maybe that’s what happens when you’re a much older vampire? All I know is that I’m just happy with what I got as it is. In fact, I think it’s perfect, and Becky Eubanks can bite me.

Melinda & Joe Lee’s
TOMMY – How am I supposed to feel? My folks are fucked up enough–treat each other like shit, fight over me, depend on me, fight over me some more–and then you throw some God damned stranger in with a happy life with some God-given sense of belonging into my house, claiming to be my brother, and I’m supposed to be happy about that? Uh-huh, no thanks.

The Motel
HINT – When in need of a place to sleep, vampires sometimes turn bathtubs into temporary coffins. All they need is a piece of wood or a dense cloth to cover the top and they are safe for the day.

Fangtasia
VETTA YAPOCHNIK born in 1978, hails from Tellinn, Estonia. With dreams of becoming a ballet dancer, Yvetta was moved to St. Petersburg by her widowed father so she could study with the Kirov ballet. Yvetta’s father worked as a journalist, becoming increasingly more outspoken about the corruption in Putin’s government. At the age of 18, just after being accepted into the Kirov’s corps de ballet, Yvetta suffered a knee injury that ended her professional dance career. Just three weeks later, Yvetta’s father was shot dead in the palace square. Devastated and destitute, Yvetta turned to Boris Bryzinsky, a handsome oligarch, who had been pursuing her for years. Brysinsky promised Yvetta a life of luxury as long as she kept her mouth shut and danced the pole whenever he said, “Ir!” She agreed, based on the terms that he put her through medical school. Four years into her cardiology training, Bryzinsky was poisoned (MI5 was implicated). The British government offered Yvetta immunity under the condition that she leave the country for good. She has called Bon Temps, Louisiana home ever since.
JESSICA – I am getting really tired of not knowing the rules of being a vampire. First, I don’t know how to not drain someone to death. Then after freaking out about it, I find out that dead bodies can just disappear. I am so fucked. Somebody out there knows killed someone. What the fuck am I going to do? Am I going to be staked or arrested? Am I going to have to go on the lam and kill whoever comes after me? I never thought I’d say this, but I sure wish that dead guy was still here.

Merlotte’s
JESSICA – Sookie is the best! I totally want to work at Merlotte’s!  I don’t know how she does it, but she always makes the best out of every situation. Like that time she told Bill to bring me to Dallas. That was perfect, so I could get out of the house and stop thinking about Hoyt all the time. Shit! I’ll probably have to see Hoyt at Merlotte’s. Fuck! Well, never mind then. Working at Merlotte’s is the worst idea ever. Why did Sookie have to butt in? Doesn’t she know I can take care of myself?

Jason’s
FYI – Are there two kinds of people or three kinds of people?
ANDY – The truth is the Louisiana police written exam ain’t easy for people with good brains, let alone someone like Jason. I haven’t got a clue how he’s going to pass that thing. First, it requires preparation, which means studying, which means memorizing. Jason forgets his own name sometimes, so I’m not sure how he’s going to remember three hundred Louisiana penal codes. Then there’s the reading comprehension and reasoning skills sections. Comprehension and reasoning are just not words you put in the same sentence as Jason Stackhouse. Too bad because I actually think that boy might make a pretty good cop out in the field.

Doctor’s Office
DR BRUCE ROBIDEAUX – He has been delivering babies in Bon Temps since 1982. Before that, his father, Dr. Robert Robideaux, had been delivering babies in Bon Temps for nearly 40 years. The women of Bon Temps have actively ignored the fact that both men perpetually smell of whiskey because neither doctor has yet to make an egregious mistake, which for a small town in the South, is unprecedented.

Bon Temps Cemetary
ANDY – Sometimes you work along side folks who are peculiar, but in spite of that, you find yourself liking them, even kind of relating to them. With Mike Spencer, that just ain’t the case. Mike is the kind of man who, when given any kind of awkward situation, which is something you find yourself in a lot when you’re called to pick up dead bodies, will pick the single most inappropriate thing to say…every damn time. I got into this work to fight crime, make life better for folks. Why did he get into his line of work? Because he likes carcasses? Not a mean guy, not an underhanded fellow, but I wouldn’t want to see how he spends his time after work, no sir.

Bill’s House, 1868
CAROLINE COMPTON (1840-1894) was born in Shreveport, Louisiana to Theodore and Leona Grant. Her father owned a sugar plantation and was one of the first men in Louisiana to free his slaves prior to the Civil War. Bill and Caroline met at a debutante ball in 1857 and were married three months later. Caroline relocated to the Compton home in Bon Temps, where she gave birth to Sarah and Thomas. In 1862, Bill left to fight in the Civil War. Caroline became a war widow in 1865 and died in 1894.
HINT – Bill’s daughter was sent away and survived the pox.
FYI – Thomas died from smallpox. Children were common victims and suffered the most from the outbreak of 1865.
FYI – Bill knew his son was afflicted because when he first approached his house, he found a sponge with aromatic vinegar by the door. It was commonly believed that vinegar could ward off the plague.

Police Exam
FYI – Jason has always been a bad test-taker. He got out of almost every exam in school on account of being the star quarterback. His teachers were afraid if they had to fail him, he would get kicked off the football team and Bon Temps High School wouldn’t make it to All-State. This is the first time Jason will actually have to perform on a test.

Construction Site
ANDY – The only reason Jason’s supervisor of the road crew is because he’s so pretty. I mean it. I ain’t saying it’s a bad thing, but our parish commissioner has a fondness for good-looking young guys.  If you want to know the truth, some people think her husband, the church organist, does too. All I know is, if you’re young and handsome, certain doors will swing wide open for you in Renard Parish, and the rest of us got to work even harder…But I ain’t bitter.

Sookie’s
ALCIDE HERVEAUX was born into a proud pack of werewolves in 1979 in Jackson, Mississippi. His father, Simeon, is a successful contractor and his mother, Reneé, is a doting mom and housewife. Alcide’s older sister, Janice, owns a successful beauty salon called “Dye Bitch.” While both Alcide and Janice were raised to be proud of their kind, and respectful to their pack, neither aspires to have were-babies. Simeon and Reneé raised them to believe that the choice was theirs if they wanted to mate with a fellow werewolf or not.

Merlotte’s
TOMMY – My folks never met a new person and didn’t see an opportunity. One of their own kin walking into their house all wounded and shit…Dollar signs started flashing in Joe Lee’s eyes the second he saw Sam. And my momma’ll go on and on about her mothering instinct, but don’t be fooled. She does exactly what the old man tells her to do because she wants it just as bad. They still think they’re going to strike it rich some day without having to work for it.

Construction Site
ANDY – I should have seen this coming with Bud. The man’s been slowing down, and all he wants from life now is to  hold his grand babies and hit the line dancing down at the Baptist fellowship hall. And what, with all the new murders in Bon Temps, the crime rate’s way higher than we got the resources for. Bud’s had a nice run, but now it’s time for someone who’s ready to take on our town’s new challenges. I think I know just the man, and his name ain’t Kenya.

Sookie’s
FYI – Sookie can read the minds of werewolves.
JESSICA – I think we’re not supposed to like werewolves. I’m not sure why. Alcide is sure hard not to like. He’s tall, and hot, and kind of looks like Jesus.
ALCIDE – I ain’t the complaining type; no one said that life was easy. I don’t see a reason to point that out all the time, but when Eric Northman came to me saying I had to babysit some fang banging little telepath while she pokes around the Jackson werewolf community, I ain’t going to deny, I threw a few pieces of furniture around because A. it’s a fucking no win situation and B. even if I do somehow survive and somehow the girl does, too, I’m bound to see my ex, Debbie, and that’s just opening up a  whole can of shit I just done closed. That said, five minutes with Sookie, I figure she’s no bodies fool, a pain in the ass, yeah, but something tells me she’s worth it. What’s she doing with a  vamp, though? That’s the messed up thing…women and the way they go for dead guys. I just don’t get it.

The Palace
JESSICA – Being home-schooled and all, I never got to go to prom. The closest I got to it was my friend Olivia’s purity ball. Everyone from Bible study class got all dressed up and this boy, Trevor, he had this trick Bible that he used to sneak in a few bottles of Zima. After Olivia swore celibacy in front of all her family and friends, we snuck out back, and we each drank one. Olivia ended up puking all over her ball gown and got sent off to reform school the very next day. I hear she broke her purity vows not too long after.

Bill’s House, 1868
FLASHBACK – The first time Lorena warned Bill about visiting his family

The Palace
JESSICA – Great! Just when I was getting the hang of hiding my savage side so I can keep people like Sookie and Hoyt around, Bill has to go and get rid of his humanity and pledge allegiance to the meanest vampire ever. I’m a teenager, and I might not like it, but I need structure and consistency. Can anyone understand that?

Merlotte’s
ANDY – This ain’t going to work if that boy don’t pull his balls out of his back pocket. The most self-involved guy I know is having a crisis of conscience, and it’s my ass that’s on the line. And not to be rude, but Tara’s sort of damaged goods, right now. What good does that dumb ass Stackhouse think he’s going to do, anyway? Just goes to show you, when a maenad comes to town, do not pick yourself the wrong wingman.

Lafayette’s
JESSICA – Way I see it is I have to do whatever Eric tells me to do, and he’s not offering me a sports car. I know for Lafayette it’s like making a deal with the devil, but A. the devil’s hot and B. the devil’s got a head for business. (I could  tell from the short time I spent with him.) And C. the devil’s not really asking, so you better make the best of it.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – Believe it or not, Terry used to have a way with the ladies–used to sing, play the guitar, the banjo. Got him a lot of tail. Then some dumb little old country girl broke his heart, and he joined the army. Everybody said it was because 9-11 had just happened, but I know he joined just to get away from the hurt this town had brought him in the shape of that little bitch. I’m not being a chauvinist. This girl was out of her fucking mind–always drama, screaming fits, threats to off herself…fucked Terry up but good. Not as much as Iraq, though.
TOMMY – Let me tell you what’s really going on here. Sam’s none too happy that we came by without asking, so he’s taking it out on Joe Lee by throwing around that under aged drinking bull shit.  And Joe Lee don’t like that there’s a new person around that’s going to judge him for being a degenerate hill billy drunk, so he’s pretending like he’s father of the year. Momma…she just wants whatever she can get from Sam, so she’s pretending it ain’t a once a day thing that we get thrown out of bars. Me…I just want to be left the fuck alone, so I’m going to do whatever I can to make everyone shut up.

Bill’s
JESSICA – It’s humiliating to act like a tough vampire only to have some creepy guy with an accent walk all over me. You know, I’m starting to make a list of things to ask Bill when he comes home. At the top of the list is how can you tell someone is a vampire before you open the door because if I could have avoided being blackmailed by a vampire holding the head of the guy I just killed, call me crazy, but I would have preferred that.

Merlotte’s
HINT – Tommy is no stranger to crime.

Lou Pine’s
FYI – “Lou Pine’s” is a pun on “Lupine,” which means characteristic of or resembling a wolf.
HOLLIS ARDOIN was born into one of the only Creole-werewolf families in Louisiana and made his way to Mississippi in the late 1980s. He has always been proud of his mixed heritage and has taken pride in his many years as the only bouncer at Lou Pine’s. But since the turf war between the two wolf packs in Jackson has escalated, Hollis has started to reconsider his line of work.
ALCIDE – Lou Pine’s has always been a haven for my pack in Jackson, a place where we can relax, be ourselves, talk were business without worry about outsiders, that is until the new pack came around. These wolves are showy and careless and crazy and violent, too. You can’t come here anymore without someone marking his territory or throwing a punch. This place used to be a God damned institution for my dad’s generation. No fucking respect. Fuck those guys.
ALCIDE – Turk and Gus, these two losers came to Jackson a few years ago, and they been Coot’s bitches ever since. And they ain’t the only ones. I don’t get it, why they look up to him. He thinks he’s so fucking alpha. He’s a fucking dumb fuck, no discipline, mean, insecure, fucked up. Jackson was once home to the proudest pack of Weres in the whole state. Now…because of guys like Coot…Who the fuck is named Coot? All kinds of bad shit is going down: robberies, assaults, a couple of murders, even. Now my pack’s afraid to walk down the streets we used to own. Just glad Sookie made it out alive, and Coot…what a fucking dumbass name.

Sookie’s
JESSICA – Oh my God! I feel so bad. I didn’t know that freak was going to glamour Tara and force his way in. I just thought that he liked her and wanted her name so he could ask her out on another date. That’s what he said, and I wasn’t thinking straight because he had that head and was going to tell on me if I didn’t give him what he wanted. Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck!

Episode 4 “9 Crimes”
Transcribed by Renée

Alcide’s apartment
ALCIDE – Goddamn, Sookie smells so good…Don’t do there. It’s dangerous. Eric Northman wants her. Don’t go there. ‘Cuz vamps…look, they can kick out wolf asses. Maybe a pack of five could take down a very young vamp. Maybe. But Coot’s fucking pack, they haven’t figured that out. They actually think they can fight vamps. They’re always grinning like fucking idiots. Damn she smells good.

The palace
JESSICA – If there is anything I know after all the trouble I’ve had with Hoyt, it’s that being in love with a human causes a whole mess of problems. And sometimes the more you love them, the more you have to stay away from them because you love them but you know you’re no good for them. Daddy always told me life wasn’t fair. Well, being dead ain’t fair either.

Alcide’s apartment
ALCIDE – Doesn’t matter if they’re human or wolf–a woman is still a woman. No matter what you say, when you’re having ‘the talk,’ she’s going to hear exactly what she wants to. I don’t blame any of them, though. I mean, who the hell wants to hear it’s over after all the time you spent loving somebody? I know I sure as hell didn’t.
ALCIDE – Weres run hot. Shifters, too. You get used to it. We don’t feel hot to ourselves. We feel normal, but you guys feel a little cold to us. It’s nice, like the cold side of the pillow on a warm humid night.Goddamn, Sookie smells good.

Merlotte’s parking lot
TOMMY – Last five years or so I’ve been begging my parents to get a new van. I even got the guys at the tire shop to get them a good deal on a used Areostar with hardly any miles on it. Joe Lee won’t have it. Says he don’t give a crap what the outsides look like as long as the insides are as smooth as whiskey. And if anyone knows whiskey, it’d be Joe Lee. Fucking dick is my father. Thanks, life.
TOMMY – It doesn’t matter how embarrassed I get or how much we fall on hard times, my parents are still promising me things will get better. People will stop chasing us down for being late on rent or for squelching on deals or calling Joe Lee out for scamming at the pool hall or the racetrack. Fuck. I keep wanting things to turn out different with Sam, but when it comes to my parents, you do not get your hopes up.

Sookie’s
JESSICA – First time I glamoured someone, I made him squawk about Becky Eubanks, this self-righteous total slut I knew back in my human life, and it was hilarious. Glamouring is so fucking awesome. It’s crazy fun, and suddenly, their mind goes blank and they’re like giant puppets. You know, Mama and Daddy never let me do anything ever, and now, I get to make other people do anything I want. So it’s,like, totally worth the wait.
FYI – Franklin Mott glamours Tara into asking Sookie pointed questions regarding her whereabouts and uses his vampire hearing to listen to Sookie through the line.
HINT – Franklin lost eye contact with Tara, intentionally breaking the glamour. How else will Franklin’s impulsiveness get in the way of his goals?

The palace
JESSICA – I get it. You’re in love with someone long enough who doesn’t love you back, you’re bound to go insane. I can’t imagine how I’d feel if I loved Hoyt and he didn’t love me back. And I totally get having strong feelings about your maker.Hell, even when I’m pissed at Bill for leaving me to fend for myself, I still feel more connected to him than I ever did to my human family. But there’s connected, and then there’s totally bat-shit crazy. I think everyone knows where Lorena falls on that scale.

Alcide’s apartment
JESSICA – When I spent time with Eric the first time Bill ditched me, Eric told me he’d teach me just about everything he knows. And someone who’s been around as long as he has…you better believe he knows a lot, but it turns out that it was a total lie. He hasn’t taught me to fly yet, and I don’t even know if I’ll ever be able to. But I picked up playing the clarinet super fast and as soon as Pam taught me, I figured out how to drink without killing people. I’m gonna be alive forever, so as long as I got a teacher around, I’m guessing I’m gonna figure out how to do somethings special…one of these decades.
FYI – Eric was born in Oland, and much of his childhood summers was spent playing by the North Sea.
HINT – Humans dream of vampires if they have ingested their blood; vampires, however, do not dream about humans because of any ‘blood connection.’ If they dream of humans, it is for other reasons. This is the first dream we’ve seen Eric have about Sookie.
ALCIDE – Coot’s pack–You can’t even fucking call them a pack. A pack of fucking morons. Wolves do not drink vamp blood. Stuff’s completely unpredictable. Brings out the animal aggression in us. It ain’t pretty. I wonder where they fucking got that shit. A fucking vamp probably, probably making a fortune. Do not even get me started on vamps–cold, calculating, greedy freaks.

Lala’s car
FYI – Lafayette’s car is an SV9, a.k.a a ‘competizione supercar’–Italian, style with a Corvette V8 grunt.

Alcide’s apartment
JANICE HERVEAUX has always marched to the beat of a different drummer. But that has little to do with being a werewolf. She practically came out of the womb speaking full sentences, and she hasn’t stopped talking since. She went missing for two weeks after she graduated high school and returned an emphatic astrologist and aspiring hairdresser. Her parents loaned her the money to open up a beauty parlor and business has been booming ever since. She’s fiercely loyal to her family, especially her little brother, Alcide.
ALCIDE – My sister Janice is kind of a ‘free spirit.’ Has like…17 dogs; started smoking pot in junior high and never stopped. I thought we lost her there for a while after high school. She went missing for two weeks. Our mom’s already packing up her stuff for Goodwill, and one day, she just reappeared on the doorstep. Said she’d been on a vision quest, found her purpose in life…Whatever. Since then, she’s made a decent life for herself–good business doing hair. Yeah, she’s nosy as all hell when it comes to my love life, but I could do a hell of a lot worse than a sister who cares too much about her baby brother.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – Look, I meant it when I said I learned everything I know about being a cop from Bud. And I’m sad to see a good man go, but there’s nothing I care more about than protecting this town. And if you’re heart ain’t in it, you can’t fake it otherwise. So I say, “Good on Bud, and good on his wife, who’s gonna have him extra now to go square dancing his way to the state championships. He had to skip out last year on account of some burglaries and such. And I say, “Hell, life is short. Bust out that bolo tie. Promenade if that’s what makes you happy, Bud.”
KITCH MAYNARD People always say that Kitch Maynard, Bon Temps’s high school quarterback, was born to be a football star. His Pop Warner days were a series of wins, touchdowns, and running circles around the other boys. There was nothing he couldn’t do–except for math, science, and English. But just like they did for Jason Stackhouse, his schoolteachers looked the other way once they saw what he could do on the field. And his girlfriend, Tammy? She plans on riding his coattails all the way to the pros.
ANDY – Stackhouse was a cocky little shit, too, when he was in high school. Hell, still is. I’d help him out and all, give those kids hell for being obnoxious and disorderly, but damn it, if it ain’t more of a kick in the pants to watch Stackhouse go head to head with his little doppelganger.Plus being new acting sheriff and all, I got bigger fish to fry. You know what I mean?
ANDY – I don’t know why Kenya’s got such a bug up her ass about me being acting sheriff. It’s a little thing called seniority and hierarchy, and…well, some other stuff, too, but the point is me being acting sheriff is right. And right’s right, and their aint’ two ways about that. And I’ll tell you what’s wrong, getting all gussied up to honor Bud then pulling a Jane Bodehouse bellied up to Sam’s bar. That ain’t the making of a sheriff. No, sir…or ma’am.

Alcide’s apartment
ALCIDE – Now I know I told her to go get done up by my sister, and, hell, I knew my sister was good, but I didn’t know how good till I saw Sookie. Remind me to thank Janice for that.
ALCIDE – Sookie may be able to get in to Lou Pine’s with her new look, but what if that bar’s full of V junkies? I don’t know how the hell we’re gonna get out alive.

The palace
FYI – Russell and Talbot are known enthusiasts of great literature and have taken special care to celebrate established writers and financially support young novelists and playwrights. Both Kipling and Shakespeare were guests in their home. While Kipling always had fine manners, Shakespeare was a bit of a freeloader, using their home as a writing retreat and “accidentally” pocketing some of the couple’s prized antiques. Russell and Talbot often looked the other way, considering the stolen goods to be part of their ‘contribution to the arts.’
FLASHBACK to see when the Queen found out Bill knew she was selling blood. (Sophie Ann asks Eric how Bill knew she was having Eric sell vampire blood.)
JESSICA -I wasn’t exactly around for the Inquisition, as I’m sure you know, but the Magister, he had me dragged out of the trunk of a car, thrown in a circle of riled-up scary vampires, and he foreced Bill Compton into making me, without even letting him glamour me. I was just a good little church girl who snuck out to have some fun, and, basically, he had me executed. And you could tell he got off on it–perv. So I have no problem imagining him holding a hot poker down in some dirty dungeon during the Inquisition.

Motel
FYI – Tara is not the first woman Franklin has held captive, convinced she was his soul mate. While the exact number of women he ‘collected’ over the years is not know, it is a long-standing point of contention with his employer that his love life gets in the way of his work.
HINT – Franklin went to ground a mile from the hotel, undetected by other guests, while Tara remained tied up.
FLASHFORWARD to reveal what the future holds for Franklin and Tara. (Franklin asks Tara to become his vampire bride.)

Merlotte’s
JESSICA – I know people always end up hating their jobs, and people my age aren’t even supposed to want to work, but ever since I saw those Merlotte’s uniforms, I knew I had to wear one. I just hope Sam gets that big old stick up out of his…you know where. So I can actually do some of the fun stuff.
JESSICA – All right, I know Arlene doesn’t like me because I’m a vampire, but truth be told, if she knew me while I was a human, she probably still wouldn’t like me. Guess it’s written in the stars somewhere that the only thing we’ll ever have in common is the hair. Only mine is natural.
ANDY – You been a cop as long as I have, you just get a sense of people, and I know “up to no good” when I see it. Them Mickenses smell like a barn, and that Tommy kid has more attitude than my grandmamma when Judge Judy gets preempted. I’m not saying they’re criminals or nothing. I’m just saying, it’s a good thing a decent guy like Sam is looking after them.
JESSICA – Chip was always real sweet. He knew his verses better than anybody in Bible study, and he dressed nicer than any other boy I knew. I swear, it was like little birds helped him get ready in the morning. Something about him reminds me of Hoyt. I guess it’s because, whether I’m human or vampire, I’m always meeting guys who are just too good for me.

Hotshot
HINT – The Norris clan limits interaction with the outside world to drug dealers and trips tot he market.

Merlotte’s
JESSICA – Never in a million years did I ever think I’d come face-to-face with anyone from my human life again after that disaster…You know, going home to my family. But I guess I should have seen it coming. Shreveport ain’t so far away, after all, and my face was all up on the television. Now, I know it wasn’t exactly the most honest thing to do–glamouring him like that–but it’s better for everyone this way.

Hotshot
FYI – This is not the first time Lafayette has been beaten up by rednecks. Growing up gay in a small town like Bon Temps was no easy feat.

Franklin’s car
Franklin is interested in Slappy’s Snack Shack because he had an obsession with fruit as a human. It’s what he misses most now that he’s a vampire. Franklin was an enthusiastic fruit-eater as a human. Nothing delighted him more than pomegranates in the winter and peaches in the summer. Despite his voracious vampire appetite, his longing for fruit has persisted for decades.
ANDY – I ain’t got no idea how many people have gone missing in the United States since vampires have come out of the coffin, so to speak, but if the Bon Temps body count is any indication, I think it’s safe to say, we’re in a whole heap of trouble. I don’t know how the hell you put them back in now that they’re out, but I sure wish we could. My job would be a hell of a lot easier.

Woods near Merlotte’s
TOMMY – I’ve never been proud of stealing. It’s just the only way I’ve ever learned how to really make any money. I ain’t never gonna be my parents, who just take things without feeling. You know? I find it easier sometimes after I’ve done something I know I shouldn’t just to sit a while, hide out. Get away from everyone and everything–just to think about how maybe I’ll do things differently next time. Problem with that is I could nod off and the next thing you know, I’m naked in the woods.

Fangtasia
JESSICA – There’s a hell of a lot of vampire politics I still don’t know, but the last time I met the Magister, I was a human. And now I’m a vampire. So that should probably tell you that that guy somehow is able to do just whatever the hell he wants to do. And he doesn’t have to get a warrant or ask anyone’s permission to do it.

Merlotte’s
ANDY – Hardest thing I ever had to do was pass the test for being a cop. I was never one of the smart ones in class, never really raised my hand. Dreaded people calling on me, but nothing mattered more to me, and I worked my ass off to make it happen. And it means something to me, being a cop. It means something to this town. Stackhouse wants everything easy. He ain’t got a chance of ever being a cop as long as he thinks that way.

Merlotte’s parking lot
TOMMY – Mama and Joe Lee aren’t exactly known for getting back on their feet. All I can hope for is that I get a chance to know my big brother and figure out what the hell I’m gonna do with my life, before they get to ruining it all.

The palace
FYI – Talbot dislikes Franklin because Talbot resents how much Russell’s ‘work’ interferes with their home life.. In addition, Franklin has a reputation for making a mess of whatever home he enters, and Talbot takes pride in a clean, beautiful house.

Lou Pine’s
ALCIDE – Ain’t no different for Weres than it is for humans. You get in a relationship thinking you want the same things, and down the line when you’re deep in love and deeper in the mess of it all, you find out you don’t. That…or you spend half of the relationship thinking you’re gonna change the other person. We all know how that turns out. Either way, all you’re left with is a pile of memories and CDs you got to divvy up. And if you’re lucky, you might get to keep some of the good ones.

Fangtasia
HINT – How will the Magister kill Pam if Eric does not bring Bill back to him?
FYI – As a vampire, seeing one’s progeny tortured is comparable to a human seeing his or her own child tortured.
FYI – The ‘True Death’ is when a vampire is killed, in most instances, from a wooden stake through the heart.

Lou Pine’s
ALCIDE – This is the thing about Weres: We do not date outside the pack. You stay with the group. Of course. But every werebitch, no matter what she says, she wants pups. I get it. Need to breed, us being endangered and all. But honestly, I never feel right bringing another one of us into the world. Life’s hard and full of problems I don’t want to put on my own kin. What are you gonna do? Date a human? They’re so fucking neurotic. I never met a human I’d even consider baring my soul to…till Sookie, that is.

Russell’s car
HINT – Why does Lorena look so nervous?

Strip club
HINT – Notice how Bill keeps looking in the girls’ eyes. What is he looking for?

Lou Pine’s
HINT – Russell speaks to the Weres in German. Does this hint at anything about Russell’s past?
JESSICA – Do you think all those werewolves slurping Russell’s blood are having sexy dreams about him? I mean they seem to hate everyone, including vampires and homosexuals. Them, waking up to the thought of Russell shoving his tongue down their throats, that is some poetic justice right there.
ALCIDE – As far back as any wolf can remember, we’ve stayed as far away from vamps as possible. We don’t mix. We’re alive; they’re dead. End of story. Now this pack of freaks is submitting to one of them, drinking his dead blood? It ain’t right. It means the end of the world or something. You don’t fuck with nature.

Strip club
FYI – Bill is trying to find someone without a family or any connections to loved ones.

Lou Pine’s
ALCIDE – My pack, we don’t go around branding people. Packs should be about honor, not treating members like cattle. If Debbie gets herself branded, it’ll be a hell of a long road back for her, and that scares me way more than the iron burning staight through her skin.
ALCIDE – Shifting for Weres isn’t all that different than it is for shape-shifters, except you don’t need to imprint on any other animal because you’re a wolf, and that’s that. Me, I feel it in my gut first. Some Weres feel it in their heads or their chests…or other places. But no matter where you feel it, first thing that happen, you’re eyes start glowing. Then, before you know it, so quick as you can barely see it happening, every outside trace of human is gone. You’re a head to toe wolf…or head to tail, I guess.

Russell’s car
JESSICA – Um–No contest. Human blood over Tru Blood any day. It’s like asking people to choose between a steak and that canned meat. And I get it. If you’re human, you gotta watch what you eat so you can live longer, but if you’re already dead, why not enjoy yourself and go for the good stuff? It’s not like you’re going to get fat.

Episode 5 “Trouble”
Transcribed by Renée

The palace
JESSICA – I understand that for vampires, humans are food, but I still don’t understand how so many vampires can treat humans like pets. I get it, I’m a baby, so I don’t know how I’ll feel in like 500 years. But I can’t imagine ever treating someone like Tara like a dog. She’s so cool. I’ve always been a little intimidated by her, but secretly, I hope she’ll become my friend. I can’t imagine waking up one night an being like, “Oh, she’d make a good lap human or sex toy.” I mean, that just doesn’t make sense.
HINT – Franklin and Russell have been working together for over 40 years.
FYI – In all the years that Franklin has been in Russell’s employ, he has brought countless human women with him to Edgington Mansion. Each time, Franklin promises “this one is different.” But without fail, Franklin becomes obsessed, acts irrationally, and ends up creating a mess that Talbot has to clean up.
JESSICA – I know I’m supposed to hate Lorena because of everything she’s done to Bill, but she’s so pathetic, I can’t help but feeling bad for her. Girls like boys who are hard to get. It’s not a secret. Even I know that. But Lorena’s had 150 years to figure out that Bill’s just not into her.She can’t let go. Seriously, move on. It’s kind of tragic.

Alcide’s truck
ALCIDE – Being around so much of that shifting energy is some strong shit. Forces event eh most civilized of men to submit to their animals states. And now good Weres turn into good wolves. It’s not like once we’re in our wolf state, we’re all assholes…but we are animals. Lucky for me and Sookie, I was able to avoid the shift. I think it’s because my human heart hurt so bad for Debbie, that wolf part of me didn’t take over.
ALCIDE – All of that animal energy is like a drug in and of itself. You throw some vamp blood in there, I imagine it’s like a junkie finding his first high over and over again. So even though it stands against everything wolves are about, staying loyal to the pack above everything else, it draws us too strong. Now all those blood heads are Russell Edgington’s little bitches for life.

The palace
FLASH FORWARD to reveal if Eric and Talbot will get along with one another.
JESSICA – [Laughs] Bill selling V? That’s about as believable as Hoyt’s mama actually liking me. Bill’s all about doing what’s right. That’s on of the reasons we never get to have any fun. I mean, he’d stake himself before he’d use his own kind’s blood for profit
FYI – Being just a sheriff, Eric has no authority with the likes of the Magister. While he may agree with Russell’s diatribe, he is in no position to take sides while Pam is in the Magister’s hands.

Alcide’s
ALCIDE – Debbie’s always been one of them girls that had to push the envelope. It’s like she wasn’t living unless she was giving someone and their rules the middle finger. That’s why I fell in love with her. She took me on a ride and gave me a taste of the world. She just didn’t know when to put the breaks on. Now she’s on a one-way street to self-destruction. Looks like she plans on taking a lot of folks down with her. Goddamn it.
ALCIDE – I know Sookie came to Jackson to find Bill, but she don’t know how lucky she is to have seen what she’s seen and not be killed. Taking on Debbie all hopped up on that shady-ass vamp, Russell Edgington’s blood. Heh. Sookie’s either the feistiest chick I ever seen, or she ain’t all that smart .

The palace
JESSICA – Okay, I admit I killed that trucker, but it was an accident. And this guy, Franklin, he cut off his head on purpose. He probably enjoyed it, too. A regular Jeffrey Dahmer. Oh my God. I still can’t believe I lead him straight to Tara. I swear to God, if she makes it out alive, I will glamour her, so she never remembers this freak.

Sheriff’s station
ANDY – Way I see it, work is work. It ain’t social hour. Of course, I am in an important position of authority now, so I don’t have the same luxury of chitchat that Kenya and Kevin do. And I once read in a book, “To be a good leader, one should encourage camaraderie among co-workers.” So I guess they can talk about mulch if they feel like it. Whatever floats your boat.
ANDY – Puleeze! I ain’t scared of Kenya. I’m her boss, for God’s sake. It’s just…She got a loud bark when she ain’t happy and because she’s a lady and all, you never know when she ain’t gonna be happy. So I try to keep her in check. Too much on my plate right now for me to have to be dealing with feminine issues.

Sam’s rent houses
TOMMY – Like Mama said, it’s a little game Jo Lee and I play. He likes to brag about how tough he is, how even though he’s an old and sorry-ass man, he’s still the ‘big man’ of the house, so I thow shit at him just to keep him on his game. He likes it. Says it keeps him young. Douche.
ANDY – I ain’t never seen my cousin so happy. Terry’s a real sensitive guy, feels things in a big way, but he never could explain any of those feelings to any of us. I think that’s why being in nature’s always been his thing–hunting in the back woods or being out on that fishing boat. Always some place quiet. Only place he felt he belonged. But now, since, Arlene, everything’s changed. Makes me think there’s hope for all of us.
TOMMY – Handyman, huh? Huh…I guess he could make that work. He’s real good with tools and jerry-rigging and shit. I’ve seen him pick every kind of lock out there. I’ve never seen him fix anything for anyone but himself. But hey…maybe Sam coming into our lives is gonna turn over a new leaf for everyone. Yeah…that’ll happen.

The palace
HINT – Tara does not know that Franklin has been bringing human pets to Russell’s for several decades, perfecting his technique at keeping them captive.

Alcide’s
ALCIDE – The packmaster is the leader of our pack. We’re social animals, and because most wolves are boneheads, the only way to keep order is to obey our alpha. And also because we were persecuted for so long, out alpha is the one in charge of protecting us. He’s kind of like a king. You obey him until someone dumb and strong enough comes along and takes him out, which is why he’s gotta know about what went on here at Lou Pine’s.

Sheriff’s station
ANDY – Stackhouse is really starting to irritate me. I know he’s all shook up by the murder situation, but he’s acting like a 5-year-old, like a 5-year-old with a bad case of ADD, and he’s the one holding the secret that could get us both put away for life. I swear to God, if I end up in a cell with Stackhouse, I will end it all right then and there.

The palace
FYI – Cooter and his pack of wolves protect eh grounds of Edgington Mansion during the day. While they are a fierce and deadly pack, their addition to V is starting to hinder their performance as guards.

Merlotte’s parking lot
TOMMY – Lafayette’s cool by me.I’m not sure exactly what his deal is, but that’s probably what I like about him. he don’t want people up in his shit, so I know he’ll stay out of mine.
ANDY – Who would’ve thunk? Terry’s got a girl and a baby on the way, and Lafayette gets shy and out of sorts when he’s got himself a crush. Two things I never thought I’d see. Goes to show, love makes everyone crazy, and if you’re already crazy like Terry and Lafayette, then love makes you so crazy, you’re almost normal.

Dirt road
ALCIDE – Our pack at Jackson used to be about 200 strong. Now that they’re dropping like flies to the other pack, we’re down about 30 percent. Those ain’t good numbers. We continue at this rate, we’ll be gone in no time at all.
ALCIDE – I never seen Colonel Flood scared of no one before. Packmasters are supposed to defend the pack against anything. Lay down and play dead? That ain’t a strategy. It’s the means to end up that way. Just goes to show how big a threat this pack of V-drinking bastards are. Not to mention that vamp, who it turns out, is their fucking king. Sookie and I are in it deep now.

Crystal’s truck
CRYSTAL NORRIS was born in 1990 to Calvin and Jean Norris. She has led a very sheltered life, only leaving Hotshot for her weekly trip tot he supermarket and pet store. Fraternizing outside the family is looked down upon in Hotshot, so Crystal’s whole social life is comprised of her many brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, and uncles.
ANDY – I know I told that boy to think with his dick, but that don’t warrant stealing a police vehicle. That boy’s lack of impulse control is my biggest liability. When the shit comes down, how can I trust he won’t sell me down the river?
ANDY – I know I ain’t the world’s biggest Casanova, but if I went up to a lady and said, “I’m Andy Bellefleur, and I want to know you,” I’d be arrested for sexual harassment and embarrassing myself. Jason, on the other hand, is probably gonna get laid every which way but Sunday for that. I believe everyone’s given 100 points in the world when they come out. Some get 50 for looks, 20 for brains, 30 for sense. Jason got 99 points for getting lucky with the ladies…and one point for everything else.

Merlotte’s
JESSICA – Whenever my sister Eden would rile me up, or my daddy would yell at me, my mama would repeat that Bible passage about turning the other cheek. So when Arlene first started treating me like I was some kind of crazy monster, I heard my mama’s words echoing in my head. And I thought about it for a few minutes, but I think revenge is maybe way more fun.
JESSICA – Bringing another girl to Merlotte’s? This is our place. This is where we met. He can’t just bring some random slut here and act like it’s no big deal. Is he trying to make me jealous? Wait…do you think he still wants me?
SUMMER TALULA HUCKABY (born 1987) is a good Christian girl, who has devoted herself since childhood to becoming the best wife possible. She perfected her skills at needlepoint, crochet, and embroidery by the age of ten. She is also a prize-winning baker, a certified nurse, and once, she built an entire house by herself from scratch for Habitat for Humanity. Since the day she laid eyes on Hoyt Fortenberry, she’s had her heart set on marrying him.
TOMMY – Whoo! That Jessica is world-class…and she don’t even know it. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have to be the one to break her in…and I’m okay with that.
TOMMY – Joe Lee thinks he owns me, but he don’t. I’m working for Sam now; I’m not gonna run to him every time he wants to put me in a –good riddance to those days.

The palace
JESSICA – Tara is totally playing Franklin, and he’s so insane, he’s gonna buy it. I need to take some tips from that girl. She’s got it figured out. Shit…Wait! Do I get tips from her before or after I glamour away this nightmare situation I put her into?
JESSICA – I don’t know what Russell is trying to accuse Bill of, but he’s obviously trying to frame him for something. I mean, he did make me a vampire, and he’s useless as all get-out as far as makers go, but Bill loves Sookie more than my mama loved Jesus. He would never do anything to hurt her…except for breaking up with her, of course.
FLASH FORWARD to reveal if anyone else in the Stackhouse family might be a telepath. (Sookie tests Hunter for telepathy at the aquarium.)

Merlotte’s
ANDY – I know better than anyone Stackhouse has no shot at passing the written exam, but I still deserve more gratitude from him than that. After I called my second cousin, Theodore, who is friends with the governor, and got him to pull some strings at the state level. And that was not fun because he always goes on and on about how I must have been adopted because no other Bellefleur has a receding hairline.
ANDY – I never had a chance to observe the mating rituals of homosexuals. Is that what Lafayette is? Not to be ignorant or anything…I just thought maybe he had his own category.

The palace
ALCIDE – Coot’s always been a bad seed. Never wanted to fall in line with our pack. He’s always out for himself.Colonel Flood had to kick his ass more than once. It’s no surprise he ended up leaving our pack for a bunch of like-minded sociopaths. What’s surprising to me is that Debbie would fall for him. Must be all that vamp blood she’s drinking. Makes her hallucinate he’s somehow worth loving.

The woods by Merlotte’s
ANDY – Jason falls fast and hard for a pretty face. No mystery there, but now that he’s having all these feelings about killing Eggs, he’s way more intense than I ever seen him. He’s gonna get his heart broken, I just feel it…and probably hurt that poor girl in the process.
FLASH FORWARD to reveal one of the reasons Jason and Crystal can’t be together. (Jason finds a panther in his bedroom.)

The palace
JESSICA – Considering Russell make Talbot a vampire because he couldn’t bear to face eternity without him, he certainly doesn’t act like he appreciates him very much. If I made Hoyt a vampire–which I would never do–I would spend every hour of every day trying to make it up to him. I guess it’s a romantic idea, but these guys don’t make spending the rest of time together look so good.
HINT – Shoney’s is Franklin’s favorite restaurant to take his human pets. He always insists that they order the strawberry pie with extra whipped cream. It is rumored to have been his last meal before he was turned vampire.
JESSICA – Is everyone in that fucking house fucking crazy? Why do they all wanna make each other miserable? I really thought that Tara was gonna win this one, but now Franklin’s gonna turn her. And how am I gonna glamour her if she’s a vampire?
HINT – Eric seems to recognize that crown.

Oland Flashback
KING ULFRIK and QUEEN ASTRID ruled the Viking island of Oland in 900 A.D. King Ulfrik was an esteemed Viking warrior and Astrid was considered one of the great beauties of her time. While Ulfrik had a reputation for being unrelenting on the battlefield, where he earned the scar on his face, his love for Astrid was so great, it softened his temper at home, and he raised his children with less of an iron fist. Ulfrik and Astrid met their death in a freak accident one winter’s night when a pack of wolves attacked them in their own home. The story of their death has continued to intrigue the many thousands of tourists who visit Oland each summer.
ANNA UTVIK was a commoner born and raised on teh island of Oland. When she was 15, Eric spotter her at Skordefest, the annual harvest festival and promptly fell in love with her. He begged his father to hire her as a maidservant in their home, convincing the King she was a talented seamstress. Eric and Anna had a torrid affair but after a violent wolf attack left much of the family dead, Anna found herself without a job. She went on to marry a common man named Johan and continued to work in the homes of the nobility.

Alcide’s
ALCIDE – Damn it. I thought Bill meant it when he broke up with Sookie, she was being naive for going after him. I don’t know any more. I guess it’s like I said before, there’s no nice way of getting out of these things. I hope he knows how lucky he is.

Episode 6 “I Got a Right To Sing the Blues”
Transcribed by Osterby

Russell takes Sookie and Biil back to his mansion
MARCO and KLAUSE were best friends from a poor village in Germany, where they met Russell during WWII.  He thought them to be terrible soldiers, but loyal friends and hard workers.  He offered to have them turned in exchange for lifetime employment.   Not the brightest of men, they did not take into consideration what they’d eventually wish for lives beyond being henchmen; however they are forever in debt to Russell for bringing them to the United States and allowing them to live in the finest of workman’s quarters ever known.

Inside Russell’s entry hall
JESSICA – Whether your maker trains you or is a total loser in that regard, and I’ll not mention any names, Bill Compton, the older you get the stronger you get.  Sure any vampire can kick a human’s ass, but I’m talking vampire to vampire, and right now I’m just a baby. But man, I cannot wait for the day when I can just throw people across the room just by flicking my fingers.  Not that I have anyone specific in mind that I’d like to do that to.

Eric and Russell talk around Sookie
HINT – Is there any reason why Eric keeps referring to Sookie as it?

Talbot has a snit over the hole in the ceiling
JESSICA – Once a drama queen always a drama queen. Sure you can become a vampire, live forever, get smarter and richer, and learn how to fly, and shit like Eric, or you can be the same bratty person you always were and spend butt loads of money on ridiculous things and then complain when they get messed up.  I like a dose of drama now and again, just for good measure. It’s gotta get old after a while, right?

Russell yells at Lorena, ‘Do not defy me.’
FYI – Lorena once had an opportunity to marry into royalty but her obsession with Bill Compton muddied the waters and her engagement, if it can be called that, was called off.  She has attempted to ingratiate herself to kings and queens ever since, but sometimes forgets her place in the pecking order.

Lorena threatens to wear Sookie’s ribs as a hat
FLASH FORWARD – How Sookie stakes Lorena.

At Merlotte’s
TOMMY – Jessica may be busy working at Merlotte’s, but we all know what she’s thinkin’ about–thinkin’ about Hoyt, Hoyt, Hoyt, Hoyt.

Arlene explains how Merlotte’s prepares peas
PEACH ABNEY who claims to be 38 but is in fact pushing 42, was born in Bon Temps and has only made it as far as the Shreveport Mariott, where she was named Miss Juniper Tree in her early teens.  She promised herself she’d leave Bon Temps for the big city someday, but after meeting Bo Gibson at the Super-Save-a-Bunch, all bets were off.  Bo proposed to her a month later, and she happily accepted.  If Peach hadn’t found Bo making out with her maid of honor right before their vows, she’s be Mrs. Gibson to this day.  Instead, she lives in Bon Temps, still single,  her only pleasure being her weekly trip to the salon and the meal out afterwards.

Arlene cutting lemons
HINT – The hungrier the vampire, the more tempting the sight of blood.  This is especially true for a baby vampire, who has less control over her fangs and impulses.
JESSICA – Ever have that dream when you were in school, naked and everyone’s just staring at you?  Well I didn’t go to real school because my parents thought I would make friends and get an STD or whatever, but I’m guessin’ my fangs come out at the worst moments possible, that’s about as close to naked high school dream as I can get.

Jason and Crystal by the lake
HINT – Why do you think Crystal feels warm?
HINT – Crystal seems to get upset very quickly.
HINT – Notice Crystal’s strong sense of smell.

Eric and Sookie chat in Russell’s office
JESSICA – From the little time I spent with Eric, I know you can never really trust him.  Not because he’s necessarily a bad guy, though. He’s done some really fucked up shit , but mostly, it’s because you never really know what he’s up to.  He’s almost always up to somethin.’
FLASHBACK – Eric promises his dying father vengeance.
HINT – Eric treats the king with formality and respect.
FYI – Marie of Romania, daughter of Prince Alfred and Grand Duchess Marie Alexandrovna, was born a British princess and became a Romanian Queen by marriage.  She lived from October 1875 to July of 1938.

At Marlotte’s
TOMMY – I know Jessica gets all embarrassed when her fangs come out, but I think it’s hot.  Course shifters don’t have things commin’ out every time we get excited.  Closest thing we get is shifting back into human when we fall asleep.  The Lord knows it’s not easy to explain that one, but a chick can fang out like that, show her dark side, hot.
JESSICA – After you get the hang of it, glamouring people is like taking candy from a baby, and that Peach was about the biggest whinny cry baby I’ve every seen since Eden got her tetanus shot.  I figured that she was giving Arlene such a hard time and it was my fault that Arlene got stiffed,  I’d do my part to make it a better evening, for all parties involved, myself included.  Just like everyone else who comes to Merlotte’s, I was simply aiming for something to eat.

Parking with Lafayette and Jesus
ANDY – Lafayettes always been a mysterious one, always kept his private life private, which is kinda funny seen as though he’S just about the flashiest dresser I ever seen.  Lord only knows where he goes to put them getups together. Boy sure does have a lot of pizzaz.
ANDY – Jesus seem like a good fellow, unlike some of the townsfolk around here.  Here he seems to take pride in the simple things, like haircuts and putting on a clean shirt for going out in public.  Normally I make it a policy not to trust any guy named Jesus because it don’t seem right to have the same names as ouR Lord, but I think a decent guy like Jesus just  might call for an exception.

Sookie and Russell have a fireside chat
HINT – Vampires, like humans, can sit beside a fire without getting burned.
HINT – There is only on king or queen per state.
ANDY – Michelle and Corbett Stackhouse were salt of the earth. Weren’t ever a finer, nicer couple. Always showed up for whatever church bake sale or town meetin’ we drummed up. Sure their kids turned out a little strange, but that ain’t got nothin’ to do with them.  You can only fight nature so much.
HINT – Are there any other gifts Sookie has that she’s yet to learn about?
JESSICA – Sookie’s got more balls than almost any man in this hick town.  She stands up to just about anyone anywhere if it means protecting the people she loves.  I’ve seen it once or twice, right before my own eyes.  You know when it come to Sookie and whatever powers she’s got, you should just count your blessings she’s on your side.

Lorena plays Billie Holiday for Bill
HINT – Why does Lorena regard her memories of Bill in the 1930’s so fondly?
FYI – Unlike Bill, Lorena has embraced her violent, murderous vampire nature.  She appears to have learned it from her maker, Istvan; he encouraged her most primal self.  She always assumes Bill would do the same. However, Lorena soon discovered that he could not completely let go of his humanity.

Tara and Franklin’s love nest
JESSICA – Tara and I haven’t spent any time together, but if she were a vampire, man we’d have nothing but time.  It would be kind of cool, I think–not being the newbie for once. It’d be kind of like having a kid sister you can show the ropes to and grow up with.  I mean sure, Eden followed me around like a lost puppy some days you’d haf‘ta fight yourself not to wanna kick, but the way she’d look at you when you taught her how to do something new or how she’d look up to you in grown up shoes or your first bra. I mean there ain’t nothing like it.  And I swear if Tara becomes a vampire I am stickin’ around; not leavin’ her to fend for herself like Bill keeps doin’ with me.

Eric and Talbot play cards
FYI – Kaiserspiel is a variation of Karnoffel, one of the oldest card games in existence, dating back as far as 1426.  The more modern Kaiserspiel is still played today in and around Luzern, Switerland.

Russell invites Eric to accompany him
JESSICA – Know it’s not very polite of me, but man, I would give anything to watch Talbot really fly off the handle, and I certainly understand what it’s like when people keep running off to do more important things when they are suppose to stay home and take care of the people they’re supposed to take care of.  But it is kind of fun to watch Talbot lose his shit.  I swear that if a vampire’s head could pop off and then get plopped back on again, I so bet that would happen to Talbot.

Sookie gets locked into the Bathory suite and hears Tara
ANDY – The idea that someone could just look at you and hear what’s going on in your head, well that’s just weird.  Sookie Stackhouse has read my own brain more times than I care to admit.  Yeah, she’s a strange one, and she’s got even stranger taste in men, what with datin’ a vampire and workin’ for a man who turns into animals all willy nilly, but it ain’t right of me to judge, ain’t my place, long as she don’t get in trouble and she keeps me the hell out of it.

Eric and Russell’s road trip
JESSICA – See, just like I told ya. Eric’s had like a thousand years to get good at lying.  And the man is damn near perfect at it, and you can’t blame Russell if he can’t figure it out. No one can.  It’s kind of awesome, actually. I mean if you’re not the one he’s lying to, of course. That  sucks, big time.
ALCDE – When it comes to Weres and shifters, most of us are just waitin’ around to see how it goes with vamps commin’ out of the coffin, see it we’d ever want to do the same.  Personally, I don’t see the need for it. We never had the same problems they did.  We could always pass like normal folk.  We paid taxes, owned our own businesses, and just kept our secret life secret.  More messes vamps get into in the public eye, more it seems smart to just stay as we are.  I ain’t seen no sign that says that God hates fur.
FYI – Russell’s alliance with Weres is rooted in his history and his desire to obtain as much power as possible.  Weres have the ability to do Russell’s “dirty work” during the daytime, allowing him to rest soundly until night.
HINT – Russell believes humans are destroying the earth, and vampires, being immortal, will have to face the consequences of this carelessness.  How might this theory impact his future actions?

Lala shows Jesus his crib
FYI – Virgin of Guadalupe:  Beloved symbol and patron of Mexico, thought to be a bridge between the Aztec world and the Spanish Tontantzin, otherwise known as “Our Lady,” is a title given to female deities in both Aztec mythology and Nahuas.
FYI – In Yoriba mythology, Ellegua is an extremely well-known deity.  Sango (Known as Chango in Latin America) is a Yoriba sky father.  God of Thunder and Lightning.

Lafayette and Jesus whoop Hotshot ass
FELTON NORRIS  is a member of the Hotshot community, where he is known and feared for his temper.  He got into his first fight before his second birthday and hasn’t stopped throwing punched since.  He is promised to Crystal Norris, despite her protests that she doesn’t love him.
FLASH FORWARD – Felton shoots his daddy-uncle Calvin.

Sophie Anne feels lucky tonight
JESSICA – Thing is a greedy vampire isn’t much different than a greedy human.  Only you have like, forever, to figure out how to get everything you could ever possibly want and the patience of a God-damn saint to get it.  So, it’s no surprise that a vampire king is just trying to expand his kingdom.  That’s what all men are always trying to do anyway.  King or no king, right?
JESSICA – Far as I know, queens can have their pick of whomever they want to feed from, and  like Eric really, who seems to get whoever he wants, wherever he wants, just by lookin’ at em.’  ‘Cept Sookie, of course.  But the Queen apparently kept Hadley around for a real long time so, she’s either got something she wants or, strange as it may sound, she may actually have some feelings for her.  I know, a vampire with feeling, right?  Trust me, happens.

Lorena and Bill chat
JESSICA – I’ve only ever seen one side of Bill, really. That’s the Bill who always says no to me in every way imaginable.  He wants us to mainstream and play by human rules, not vampires. Yeah, I know he’s looking out for me, or that is when he’s actually here.  Would it kill him to let me have a little fun once in a while?  And I can’t imagine, after being alive for a hundred years, that he didn’t do at least one dark, twisted thing, Lord knows, if he did, I’d feel a hell of a lot better for what I did to that trucker.  But let’s face it, when do parents ever admit to their kids that they were once cool too.

Debbie and Coot want to ‘get some’
ALCIDE – You think you know a person, then you break up.   They become a total stranger to ya.  This isn’t the Debbie I used to know, all strung out, willing to do anything to get her next fix.  She was the most passionate person I ever met. It’s one of the things I love most about her.  Now all that fire is gone.  It’s been replaced by this desperate all consuming need for V.  What a God-damn shame.

TBBN NEWS – Nan and Senator Finch debate the Vampire Rights Amendment
FLASHBACK – Senator Finch meets Tara at Lala’s.

At Sam’s trailer
TOMMY – Aside from makin’ fritters or whatever, Melinda was never really a mom, you know, like they have in TV commercials when they clean floors real good and make stove top for dinner and seem idiotic and happy all the time.  We never went hungry or nothin,’ and there weren’t bugs crawling around the place but she’s not exactly a–what’s the word–domestic.  Most the time she was busy waiting on Joe Lee with a beer and clicker for the TV.  It’s alright, I guess.  She tried the best she could.  Problem is, her best ain’t very good.

Tommy and Melinda talk responsibility
TOMMY – I don’t like talking about the first time Joe Lee had me doin’ his dirty work for him. Blocked it out to be honest.  I knew it was wrong, back then, just like I know it’s wrong now only I don’t have a way to say no.  And Momma, she was onboard for it.  She was proud of me, which I guess is nice, but I sure wish she was a normal mom that would be proud of me, for, like, hittin’ a baseball real far or somethin.’  As long as I been doin’ it, I still haven’t figured out a way to say no.  I guess that once you’re in it, you’re in it.  And there ain’t nothin’ you can do ‘bout it.

Tara flattens Franklin’s head
JESSICA – Truth is, I never seen a vampire die before, so I don’t know what they look like or what happens. All I know is Tara just obliterated Franklin about as much as any V fulled human could.  When was the last time you saw anyone get his face smashed in like that and live through it?

Jason delivers flowers
FYI – Why is Crystal lying?  What has Felton done in the past?

Tara delivers almonds
HINT – Talbot often requires that humans in his home adhere to strict diets informed by his menu plans.  When humans eat almonds and only almonds, their blood has a nuttier aftertaste.

Sookie and Tara tag-team Gus
ALCIDE – Now Sookie’s almost like a wolf in one respect. You fuck with someone she loves , your fuckin’ with her, and she’s not afraid to fight back.  She’s gonna make a hell of a mother someday.

Sookie and Tara escape
FLASHBACK – Bill refuses to help Tara.

Sam questions Acting Sheriff Andy
ANDY – Hell no, we ain’t got no dog fightin’ in this town.  Worse we got is an occasional burglar or town drunk who needs a night in the slammer, and no, I’m not talkin’ about myself.  All them murders recently, and then everybody in town turning into a sex crazed zombie, for a while…

Deputy-in-training Jason busts Kitch lovin’ in the back seat
TAMMY LYNNE LAKEY loves to cheer.  Back when Kitch was starting his Pop Warner days, she dreampt of cheering for the Bon Temps Eagles.  And although most girls don’t even make the squad until junior year, let alone make co-captain, Tammy Lynne did just that her sophomore year.  When she met Kitch, it was love at first sight, and they were promptly named Homecoming King and Queen.  It was the best day of her life (besides they day they had sex for the first time under the bleachers for his 16th birthday present).
ANDY – So Jason’s got a bug up his ass about this Kitch kid. So what? The kid’s a royal pain in the ass who thinks the world’s his for the taking.  Worst case scenario, Stackhouse scares the livin’ beegeebers outta some kid, who I’m pretty sure, had it commin.’  Cocky little shit.

Coot promises something better than a trip to 4-Ever Young

FYI – Although 4-Ever Young is the go-to-place for any teenager in search of both fashionable and affordable clothing, women of all ages frequent the stores in hopes of reliving their youth.

Tara runs into a wolf on the way to find a car
ALCIDE – All I know about Tara is what I heard from Sookie.  Seems true to me.  That girl is tough.  Anyone who can go through what she’s gone through, losing someone she loves and be strong enough to break out of a mansion full of vamps.  I tell ya one thing, she and Sookie stick together.  They don’t need a lone werewolf like me lookin’ after ‘em.

Lorena has Sookie up against a wall
FYI – Lorena’s vampire strength, matched with her bitterness and heartbreak over Bill’s rejection, makes for one strong woman.

Episode 7 “Hitting the Ground”
Transcribed by Osterby

Lorena takes a bite out of Sookie
HINT – Sookie’s blood does not taste like the blood of other humans.
FLASHBACK – Lorena takes a bite out of Barry the bellboy.
FYI – Bill has lost a significant amount of blood because he has been attached to silver the entire time Lorena has been cutting and draining him. Because the silver does not allow Bill to heal as he normally would, he is nearing the brink of the True Death.

Sookie tells Tara and Alcide what dead vampires look like
ALCIDE – Holy shit. I ain‘t never seen a dead vamp. I mean, you know, “dead” dead, and that is some nasty shit. You don’t even wanna know what it smells like.

Sam’s lookin’ for high stakes gambling
FRANK “Boom-Boom” BELDING is known as the toughest hillbilly bouncer in Southern Louisiana. A gun for hire, Boom-Boom has worked security for any and every kind of illegal under the sun: dog fighting, arm dealing, and drug trafficking. He knows the best safe houses, the fasted backroads into Mexico, and he can smell a rat from a mile away.
TOMMY – Joe Lee does know how to do one thing and that’s sniff out a dogfight. No matter how remote, how secret, he can find it.

Debbie aims at Alcide, then Sookie, then Alcide again
FYI – Like many drug addicts, Debbie never had a problem with violence before she began using. She got into a fist fight once in elementary school, but cried uncle when Suzy Palmer bit her arm. According to Alcide, “The V made Debbie a new Debbie. It ain’t pretty. And it sure as hell ain’t predictable.”

All Debbie wanted was a baby
ALCIDE – I’m proud of what I am. I care about my kind…The thought of us going extinct makes me sick in my stomach. The direction the world’s moving, what with vamps coming out and good Weres jumping into bad packs…I can’t, in good conscience, bring a life into the world. I don’t want my son or daughter to be held back on account of being an outsider, always having to keep a secret…The one that’s become more and more dirty. Debbie and I just couldn’t see eye to eye on that.

Cooter comes to the party
ALCIDE – You think it feels good to kill the wolf my ex-girlfriend loves? Well, it don’t. Don’t matter if he was banging her while we were still together or he’s a drug addict or a criminal. It still tears my guts out to see Debbie in so much pain. Not to mention killing one of my own kind. That bastard was coming for me. He would’ve torn out my throat. God only knows what he would’ve done to Sookie and Tara. He had to go.

Debbie will hunt Alcide down
ALCIDE – Wolves can track scent better than almost any other were or shifter out there, better than a vamp even. I don’t doubt Debbie will find me. And I’ll be ready for her when she does. I just hope she doesn’t come after Sookie or my family…Because if she does, I’ll show no mercy.

Sookie wants to ride with Bill
JESSICA – I really don’t think it’s a goof idea for Sookie to be in the back of the truck with a vampire who’s starving and dying. Even if it Bill. He is not thinking with his brain right now, if you know what I mean.

Alcide runs over a wolf
ALCIDE – The last couple of days I’ve broken every code I was raised to live by, exposing our inner world to a human, choosing a life of a human over a life of a wolf, and now, just flat out murder. But I know the difference between right and wrong. That’s the code I live by. Don’t like it? You keep it to yourself.

Jason’s not smart enough to get depressed
ANDY – It’s not that Jason is too stupid to get depressed…It’s that he’s too stupid to get depressed over the right things. His problem ain’t that he don’t know how to get Crystal back; it’s that he fell in love with a girl from Hotshot to begin with. Everyone knows those folks are about as low on the food chain as you get–bunch of inbred drug dealers living in a slum. How much worse can it get? Unfortunately, for Jason, the answer is always the same…much worse.

Hoyt reminds Jason about Crystal cousin in Jail
FLASHBACK – Jason tackles T-Dub in the Hotshot drug bust.

Sam 4-wheels, then shifts
HINT – Sam is able to shift into Tommy’s pit bull because he has observed him before, and therefore has previously imprinted on him.

Summer delivers biscuits
FYI – The secret to Summer’s biscuits is that they’re made with Bisquick. Everyone thinks they’re made from scratch, but Summer knows that Bisquick just tastes better. But the real reason they’re so good? She triples the amount of butter called for on the box.

Summer’s inner conversation
JESSICA – I don’t trust that girl. No one bakes that many biscuits and comes over to a boy’s house and plumps up pillows unless she’s up to sneaky, and, I mean, anyone could tell Hoyt’s not into her. He doesn’t like girls that are pushy…like Maxine. And she’s got really stupid bangs, and, even if I weren’t hung up on Hoyt, I’m pretty sure I’d hate her because she’s just one of those annoying, smiley blond girls who doesn’t know the first thing about pain or misery or darkness. Dumb bitch. That’s all.

Eric and Hadley visit the caged queen
FYI – The silver cage Sophie Anne is sitting in came from her dungeon where she keeps a state-of-the-art supply of torture devices.
HINT – Eric’s bleeds are not as bad as Sophie-Anne’s because he is older and because he hasn’t touched silver.
FYI – Hadley ran away from rehab around five years ago. It stands to reason that she and Sophie Anne have been together ever since.

The only vampire a vampire can trust…
FYI – While most human pets tend to be expendable when vampire politics flare up, Hadley’s relation to Sookie just might keep her alive. She is not only emotional bait to get closer to Sookie, she may also prove to have certain genetic gifts that run in the family.

Eric gives Hadley 3 stars
JESSICA – Wow, I thought Russell was bad, but Sophie Anne is totally ready to let Eric drain that girl Hadley. I thought she might have been in love with her, but apparently not, and whatever secret Sophie Anne has about Sookie must be really fucking juicy. I’m kind of glad nobody ever tells me anything. These vampire politics are so not worth it.

Sam finds the fights..My, what big balls you have…
“BIG BOBBY” TINKER has been breeding dogs for fighting since he dropped out of middle school and became a regular on the Louisiana, Tennessee, and Alabama circuits. Back in the late 90s, when Big Bobby was serving time in Pensacola for aggravated assault and battery, he found God and swore off dog fighting, but once he was back on the outside? He fell into old patterns.

Sookie feeds Bill
FYI – Because Lorena drained Bill within an inch of his life, his primal need for blood has taken over. His fang control is impaired, and he is essentially feeding involuntarily.

Tara and Alcide drivin’…
ALCIDE – I don’t know what they did to Tara in there. But judging from the energy coming off that poor girl…I got a feeling it was pretty bad. Sookie’s probably as good a friend as anyone could have, but I got a feeling Tara’s gonna need something more than a friend to get past the shit she’s seen over the last few days.

Bill drains Sookie
JESSICA – Oh, no. I hope I never get so hungry I end up feeding on someone to death again. I worry about that all the time. Part of me thought, with Pam’s advice and that time I fed on Peach, I had it all down and it would be smooth sailing from here on out, but with what Bill is doing to Sookie, maybe it’s not that easy. He loves her more than anything in the world, and just when I was starting to wonder if I was too harsh with Hoyt, now I see humans risk their lives by loving us. God damn it! If Bill kills Sookie, I’m gonna be really pissed at him.

Jason questions T-Dub at the jail
T-DUB – Like every resident of Hotshot, T-Dub has had very little exposure to the outside world. His education consisted mostly of learning the family trade, cooking and dealing crystal meth. Unfortunately, he also learned how to smoke and snort it.
HINT – What other residents of Hotshot might Crystal be related to?

Jason’s sweeping without a broom
ANDY – What the hell is Jason Stackhouse got he needs to talk to T0Dub about? Makin’ friends with a meth dealer sure ain’t gonna help him become a cop any faster.

Tara kicks Bill outta the truck
JESSICA – I get Tara and Alcide being pissed at Bill and all, but they don’t need to throw out the baby with the bathwater. Bill’s blood would’ve saved Sookie if they’d given him a chance to recover…and it’s not like he meant to kill her. I’m really beginning to understand why some vampires just keep to themselves. It is not easy being so misunderstood all the time, but how come it took him so long to start burning? That’s weird.

Sam sure looks mean…but he minds good
TOMMY – I ain‘t never been to a fight in this neck of the woods. Some of these lowlifes I’ve seen before. Dogs change all the time on account of them getting killed. And Big Bobby? He’s a real piece of shit. He’ll shoot his dogs dead even if they ain’t too badly tore up. As far as he’s concerned, one fight is enough, aAnd if they don’t show their mettle, they ain’t worth keeping alive. At least I don’t have it as bad as Big Bobby’s pups.

Sookie is rushed into the hospital
ALCIDE – Goddamn it, I should have never let Sookie get in the back of my truck with that fucking vamp. You know, I lost the love of my life to their blood, now I’m gonna lose Sookie to one of them. Fucking dead fucks. I may be a self-hating werewolf, but if I were Bill…I’d walk myself right into the sun and end that pathetic excuse for an existence.

Sookie seizes
HINT – Why is Sookie’s body rejecting the blood?

At the hospital waiting room
Sookie has no blood type
DR. JAIN SEKULER, emergency medicine. Although she has conformed to many of her family’s values, she still has a penchant for Buddhist tattoos and drum circles.
FYI – Only four blood groups exist: A, B, AB and O. While there are many subsections of these categories, each and every human being’s blood type falls somewhere on this spectrum, or so the medical community thought-–until they tried to identify Sookie’s blood.

At the dog fights
Tommy enters the fight ring
FYI – Although Tommy isn’t the smartest of people, he’s still a hell of a lot smarter than the dogs he fights. He knows how to outwit his canine competition and go in for the kill. Despite some nasty scars he’s suffered along the way, Tommy hasn’t lost a single bout on the circuit.

Sam stops the fight
TOMMY – Not until Sam did I ever realize that I wanted out of this game, out of this life. I always knew I hated it. I just didn’t know there was any other choice. Now that Sam has shown me there is, I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything so bad in my life than to get out of that goddamn ring. I don’t see other folks dragging their sons around and getting the shit kicked out of them so they can afford beer and satellite TV. That’s it. Sam opened my eyes and, he saved me. I ain’t never goin’ back.

At Merlotte’s kitchen
Lala don’t deal no fuckin’ meth
FYI – While Lafayette claims to be an entrepreneur above all else, he actually lives by a staunch code, which dictates that he only deal drugs he enjoys taking. Of course it helps that the only drug Lafayette doesn’t enjoy taking is Pepto Bismol.

At the dog fights
Tommy fits into Joe Lee’s clothes…
TOMMY – It might look like Joe Lee is the bad guy here, but Mama is just as bad. She was the one that chose to stay with him when he forced her into the ring…when he gambled away all our money…and when he got me into the dame after she retired. She ain’t no victim. She pretends like she’s got all these feelings, but sometimes I think she’s meaner to the bone than Joe Lee. He drinks to handle the world, and the booze makes him the jackass that he is. She’s just herself. Now, she might think she’s done what she’s had to do to survive, but I’m done believing that shit. I’m just done.

At the emergency room
Jason says he’s not responsible
ALCIDE – What can I say? Jason doesn’t seem like he’s so good at these type of situations, but, hell, who is? If it was my sister that was torn up and emptied by a vamp, I wouldn’t be so good neither.
ALCIDE – I never heard of anybody not having a blood type. Weres got them, vamps got them. At least I think they do. I know that Tru Blood shit comes in different types, but no blood type at all and light that shoots out of her hands? Something tells me Sookie Stackhouse is something else than human.

Tara says good riddance to Bill
ANDY – Oh. Shit. I can’t believe after all she’s been through Sookie winds up in a coma because of Bill. Don’t seem fair. I just hope that because her mind could never be still when she was awake, she’s experiencing some sort of peace right now.

Lala tells Tara and Jason to stop cussin’ at Sookie
JESSICA – Before my parents were born-again, my mama was a Christian Scientist which means she didn’t believe in giving us medicine or taking us to the doctor. Lucky for me, when she found Jesus, I was a year old so I didn’t go without normal shots or vaccines or anything. But she’s still always anxious around doctors and hospitals and, even though I know my mama is totally out of her gourd, I still get creeped out around those places. They’re so serious, and everyone’s always so sad there. I guess that’s one good thing about my new life. It kind of eliminates the need for surgery or tubes or other hospital shit.

Sookie gets her fairy on
HINT – Is Sookie dreaming?

Sookie drinks l’eau de fairy
HINT – Does Sookie have a connection to this world that she doesn’t remember?

Sookie wants to dance
HINT – Claudine can also read minds.

Lala prays Inuit style
FYI – Lafayette has always been drawn to the spiritual rites and practices of ancient cultures and indigenous peoples.

Claudine suggests Sookie not go back
HINT – Are we in a parallel universe?

Sookie and Claudine have private conversation
HINT – If it wasn’t a flood, then what DID kill Sookie’s parents?

Claudine takes a dip
HINT – Where is Claudine going? What is that pond?

Jason lets Bill give Sookie blood
JESSICA – I know everyone gives Jason shit for being dumb, and most of time, he is, but right now, he’s the smartest one in there. If Tara and Alcide had let Bill give Sookie his blood back in Mississippi, none of this would have happened. I know Bill did something real bad, but it doesn’t mean he meant to. And I get the feeling that Jason, dim as he may be, knows the difference. Thank god.

Sam and Tommy drivin’
TOMMY – I can’t say I ain’t scared about being away from my folks, and I can’t say I know for sure I did the right thing. All I know is, I feel like 10,000-pound weight has been lifted off my chest. It’s like I’ve been underwater the last 19 years and now I’m breathing oxygen for the first time.

Pam ‘s a Tiffany’s girl
JESSICA – I didn’t really like Pam at first, but, boy, was I wrong. She turned out to be so fucking cool…Even if she does clearly find me irritating. But look how the Magister is torturing her, and she’s acting like it’s nothing. I’ve never felt silver, but I have a felling it hurts pretty bad. And if Pam can keep her cool after days of that dick’s abuse, she can do anything…and probably in, like, 7-inch heels. I wonder if Bill would object to me being friends with her.

Mississippi claims Mr Northman
HINT – Why is the Magister afraid of Russell?
JESSICA – What the fuck is the Authority? Somebody somewhere has even more power than all the vampire kings and queens…and even the Magister reports to them? I am happy not knowing more…because quite frankly, all these vampires at the top of the food chain seem like real assholes.

Russell sets Pam free and restrains the Magister
HINT – This is the fastest we’ve ever seen a vampire move.

Sookie screams at the sight of Bill
ALCIDE – I ain’t surprised by Sookie’s reaction to Bill. She woke up out of a coma to the same guy that tried to kill her, and someday, she’ll be able to remember all the good things about him. She’ll come to see he was the same guy that saved her. Once you’ve been hurt like that, I’m not sure you can ever go back.

Sophie-Anne and Russell, husband and wife
HINT – Vampire marriages between kings and queens need to be approved by the Authority.

One smell can tell it all…
HINT – Like a fine sommelier, Russell recognizes where the Magister is from based on the smell of his blood. The older, more cultured, more experienced a vampire, the greater his abilities to hone in on these kinds of details.

The Magister says hello to the true death
HINT – Why did Russell kill the Magister? What kind of consequences could he face?

Episode 8 “Night on the Sun”
Transcribed by Osterby

At the hospital
Sookie screams at the sight of Bill
ANDY – I can’t imagine that feeling…being taken advantage of like that in such a bloody way. Sookie has seen a lot of pain in this world. None of it’s been of her own making. So to have someone she loves hurt her so bad…A damn shame.

Bill cannot give Sookie the life she deserves
FYI – Vampires cannot have children. In their undead state, the only way to have progeny is to turn a human.

Sophie Anne moves in with Russell and Talbot
FYI – Sophie Anne, a connoisseur of rare, exotic birds, is equally interested in finding delicious exotic humans to drink from. She has procurers for both.

Russell defends his marriage to Sophie Anne to Talbot
JESSICA – You’d think being alive for hundreds of years and all vampires would grow up…care a little less about money and power and instead, care about more important things. But it’s like they care about the stupid stuff even more because they’ve had, like, forever to collect it. I guess humans and vampires ain’t that different when it comes to money. It turns out, if you have enough of it, you can get away with just about anything.

Russell tells Talbot he killed the Magister
JESSICA – I have no idea what in God or whoever else’s name would be a punishment for killing that Magister. I mean, as far as I ever knew, he was the one who was doing all the punishing. Maybe things will go, like, completely insane or maybe some other big and powerful…I don’t know what’s gonna come and kick some serious ass. All I know is, as much as I bitch about being left behind…the truth is I am sure as hell glad I am here and nowhere near that bloody mess.

Someone Shot Debbie’s Cooter
ALCIDE – Weres are about as sneaky as sneaky gets in this world. Huntin’s in our blood. Stealth and speed are about the only two things that keep us alive. But a Were in V? Lord knows they’re stronger than usual. But all that crazy dead energy coursing through them…sounds to me like they’d be way out of control. Right now, Debbie’s about as out of control as I’ve ever seen her…which is saying a lot.

Russell questions if he can trust Eric
JESSICA – Pam is about the only person I’ve ever seen come close to trusting Eric. And Eric seems to trust her too. Everyone else, good fucking luck with that dude. The two of them got, like, the whole maker thing going on. And I mean, even when Bill leaves me alone or doesn’t exactly fill me in on…oh, say, 95 percent of what I should know there is something between us, a connection I don’t know haw to explain. Maybe I’ll find out the word in, like, a thousand years or something.

Arlene dreams of Rene
FYI – Is it possible that Rene can influence Arlen’s baby from beyond the grave or is Arlene just dreaming?

Bills home
As her maker, Bill releases Jessica
JESSICA – Oh, my God, Bill is actually home. I know I bitched about it a million times, but seeing him was like—well, I don’t know. I never had that before with Mama and Daddy. The few times they left me alone to babysit Eden I was just about the happiest girl you’d ever seen, and every time they walked back in the door…like, a pit the size of Texas grew in my stomach. But Bill comes through the door, and it’s like all the puzzle pieces that have been knocked around fit right back together. And even though he released me…you know what? He can say that all he fucking wants because, A, I still don’t really know what the hell it means. It’s not like he’s stops being my maker. That’s, like, forever, and, B. I ain’t going nowhere. Hell, I ain’t got nowhere to go.

At Sookie’s house
Alcide’s not leaving Sookie
ALCIDE – I don’t know why the deeper in the thick of things I get with Sookie…the more I find myself feeling close to her, but there’s a hell of a lot to be said about timing. And we got nothing but a big old mess of that. After what I’ve been through with Debbie and after being so hurt by Bill…ain’t neither of us ready to jump into anything new. Even if sometimes just looking at her…it feels like the best idea in the world.

Jason wants Sookie to press charges against Bill for domestic something
ANDY – Sure, vampires and humans live and eat and sleep different, but the law is the law is the law. And there ain’t no changing it. Hurting Sookie like that, he should be paying for it and paying dearly. Of course, she’s have to come forward and admit everything first, and she ain’t willing to do that. I’ve seen this all before. Women don’t wanna rat on their men. Maybe they’re scared, or maybe they still love them. Guess it’s something you can’t understand until you’re in it, but if I was her…I’d wanna throw every book at him they got.

Jason storms out
HINT – Why doesn’t Jason want Sookie to read his mind? What is he hiding?

Tara gets a foot rub
ANDY – Ain’t no one in the world closer to Tara than Lafayette. It’s like they got their own language, and no one else can crack it. Must be pretty nice to have someone on your side no matter how bad you fucked up, and if anyone in this town does, Tara and Lafayette know from fucked up.

At Tommy’s rental house
Ooo, ooo, that smell…oh, hi Mama
TOMMY – To tell you the truth, I don’t remember ever seeing Mama in the fights. I don’t know if I was just too young to watch or it’s something I packed away in my brain or something. She swears up and down she was one of the meanest out there in the ring, and I believe it. But I ain’t never seen it for myself. Good thing, I think. There’s some things you just don’t ever wanna see your parents doing, like having sex or fighting as a pit bull for money.

Mindy wants money
HINT – Do you think Melinda and Joe Lee are gone for good? What will Sam do if they turn up again?

Tara’s shower scene
JESSICA – Alright, this is one thing that I have heard, that if a human drinks a vampire’s blood, they can sometimes dream about them in all kinds of sort of ways , but mostly dirty ways, I think, which is kinds gross but kinda awesome. And I guess it demends on if you like the vampire or not.

At Lala’s house
Ruby jean comes for a visit
HINT – Lafayette got the nickname “La La’ from Tara, who couldn’t say her “f’s” or “y’s” until she was four years old. Ruby Jean picked up on it and never stopped using the endearing name.
FYI – Meadowglade has diagnosed Ruby Jean with schizophrenia.
FYI – Is Ruby Jean right believing that someone is coming after Lafayette or is her paranoia a product of her illness?

At Sookie’s house
Sookie and Tara fry like fritters in the pan
ALCIDE – One thing I know about girls being tight as Sookie and Tara…they can say just about anything to each other, even the rough stuff no one wants to hear. Sure, sometimes they’re stomping off and blowing off steam…and saying things they didn’t mean to say. Girls always find their way back to say sorry and hug and be done with it. Guys, we barely say nothin’ at all. At least you always know what a girl’s thinking. Because they’ll tell ya, whether you wanna hear it or not.
FLASHBACK – To see the last time Sookie and Tara got into a fight over Bill (During minisode, Tara questions Sookie about where Bill’s money comes from.)

Jason’s house
Jason finds his wooden bullets
FLASHBACK – To see when Jason learned about wooden bullets (Target practice with Steve Newlin)
ANDY – I ain’t never messed with wooden bullets. so I don’t have a rat’s ass clue if they work or not. But one thing I do know is, so far, Jason Stackhouse plus gun equals a mess I’m responsible for cleaning up. And I’m still working on the last time he screwed up, so I ain’t lookin’ for him to do it again anytime soon.

Crystal swims over to see Jason
HINT – Not only does Crystal seems to have a strong sense of smell, she is also very concerned about others being able to track her scent.

At Merlotte’s
Tara drops a bottle of Tru Blood
HINT-Is Tara dreaming about Franklin abain because she’s had his blood, or is her trauma triggering the flashback?

Arlene interviews Holly
HOLLY is a Wiccan, a rape survivor, and the single mother of two beautiful children. She waits tables to support herself and her family.
HINT – How does Holly know Arlene is pregnant?

Sam startles Tara
ANDY – Sam is real good to people who work for him. Treats them like family, takes care of them, asks them how their days are, shit like that. Treats me that way too, which is why, I guess, go there, feels like family, more like family than my own family.

At Jason’s house
Jason tells Crystal his brain got washed
ANDY – Something just ain’t right about them Hotshot folk. I can’t exactly put my finger on it. It ain’t just the meth labs and dirt and garbage. Everyone kind of looks the same, like pod people or something from some science-fiction TV show Portia used to watch when we were kids. Freaked me out then, and it sure as hell freaks me out now.

At Lala’a house
Jesus comes to retrieve Ruby Jean
FYI – Ruby Jean escaped right before Jesus started his shift at Meadowglade. While a new nurse was distracted with her charts, Ruby Jean bolted from the garden, exiting through the gates left open by a careless maintenance staff worker. This is not the first time in which a patient has escaped from Meadowglade. Just seven months ago, Ruby Jeans bridge partner, Lisa Lawson, who suffers from dissociative fugue disorder, was found wandering around the highway after she went missing from Meadowgalde’s weekly movie night. She was returned safely and claims to have no recollection of her recent visit to the outside world.

Ruby Jean wields Lala’s kitchen knife
HINT – What kind of “power” is Ruby Jean referring to?

Jesus trades watching TV for Ruby Jean’s knife
FYI – Jesus seems to be the only one who can calm Ruby Jean down.

Hadley leaves the queen for the day
Eric and Hadley have a meeting in the hallway
JESSICA – I guess there come that time in a vampire-human relationship where you think about turning the human. I mean, I can imagine it, otherwise, you are just setting yourself up for heartbreak. You’re gonna lose that person some day, and, gosh, if I lost Hoyt…I mean, we’re not together. Whatever, it’s fine and all. But if we were together…and I had to watch him get all old and stuff while I stayed the same, I don’t even wanna think about it. But turning someone? I don’t know if I could do it. I guess it’s hard no matter how you look at it.

On Sookie’s porch
Alcide get a call from his family
ALCIDE – I swear, when I heard Debbie was going after my family, I felt a rage boil up in me I ain’t never felt before. My sister’s crazy, but she’s good people, like the rest of my family. They ain’t got nothing to do with the mess Debbie mad between us. She ain’t got no right pulling them into it. And fuck that vamp for giving my kind blood, and fuck Debbie for taking it.

Sookie and Alcide agree they fall for the wrong people
HINT – Is Alcide breathing in Sookie’s scent because he is attracted to her or he because he wants to be able to track her if needed?

At Merlotte’s
Sam tells Tommy to leave Tara alone
TOMMY – I don’t know what Sam and Tara are all about. Maybe they hooked up once or something, or maybe he just decided to be nicer to everyone but me. But one thing is for sure, he cares about her, and it sure ain’t because she’s some great bartender or something because trust me, even when she’s around, seems like she’s not all there these days. You know what I mean?
Sam averts a confrontation between Hoyt and Tommy
TOMMY – I just don’t like that fucking Hoyt. There’s something about him. How he walks too slow, and those collared shirts that are, like, ironed within an inch of their lives. And what about the way he’s dating one girl…but then pining over a hot vampire like Jessica? He may look all nice and Sunday churchgoing and all that, but deep down, I think he’s more of a dog than I am.

Vampire fight training at Bill’s
HINT -Although mature vampires are faster and stronger than werewolves, baby vampires are sill at risk. Their skills need to be developed and honed before they can safely take on a pack like this.

Jessica tell Bill she loves Hoyt
JESSICA – Sometimes it’s like Bill knows exactly what I’m going through, being left alone and being without Hoyt. It seems like he’s hurting something awful over Sookie. I take back the things I said about him being a jerk for leaving because now I know that he didn’t mean to do it, just like I didn’t mean to kill that trucker and all. Sometimes things just happen, and when you’re a vampire, it seems like things happen more often than not. I’m just glad he’s home, so we can try and go back to normal.

At Sookie’s house
Hadley come for a visit
ANDY – Sookie’s cousin, Hadley, was maybe the wildest child this town ever saw, boy crazy, girl crazy, booze crazy, drug crazy. Did everything a person can do and not get killed doing it, and some things that could get a person killed. But I guess she just got lucky. Last I heard of her, Adele paid for her to go to a rehab in Pineville, which she ran away from. Must’ve been five or six years ago.

Hadley warns Sookie
HINT – When did Hadley tell the Queen about Sookie and why?

At Russell, Talbot and Sophie-Anne’s house
Talbot empties the cabinet
HINT – Talbot is pulling erotic scrolls off the shelf, documents from all eras and cultures, a veritable United Nations of sexual practices since the dawn of humanity.

At Jason’s house
Jason and Crystal cuddle
FYI – Arranged marriages are not uncommon in Hotshot, but jumping ship to avoid that union? That is most certainly a rarity for the community.

At Merlotte’s
Ooo, ooo that smell…
HINT – How does Calvin know that Sam is a shifter?
TOMMY – Something hit me when Calvin Norris came into the bar, something about his face, sure, but also there’s a smell I couldn’t help but notice. Struck me, even confused me a little bit because I couldn’t place it–strong or wild. Sour. Definitely animal. I can tell that, at least. All I know is something wasn’t right, and I ain’t never wrong about that.

Cocktail time at Lala’s house
Jesus agrees with Ruby Jean
HINT – How does Jesus know Lafayette os powerful? Is this what attracted him to Lafayette in the first place?

At the Royal residence
Eric and Talbot play chess
JESSICA – Ok, Eric is pretty easy on the eyes, so it doesn’t surprise me that men and women fall all over him. I just didn’t know that he was into that sort of thing. I mean, I guess if you’ve been alive for, like, a thousand years, you try just about anything and everything with anyone and everyone. Oh, hey, how about this? If I’m not settled with Hoyt or someone by the time I’m 1007 years old. maybe I’ll try swinging the other way. I mean, after growing up in a house where all we had was rules, it might be fun to deviate.

Eric and Talbot get frisky
FYI – Most vampires experience the full gauntlet of sexuality in their lifetimes, having relations with men and women, vampire and human.

At Hotshot
Jason explores with his shotgun
HINT – Note the hissing from the boy.

Jason warns Calvin
TOMMY – When you’re an outsider, you can’t really judge all the weirdoes out there in the world because I guess you’re one of them. It’s like once you’ve seen your mom turn into a turtle to avoid paying the water bill, you ain’t got any business calling anything strange anymore.
ANDY – Jason ain’t so great when he’s thinking with his mind, but when he’s thinking with his you-know-what, he gets himself into some seriously deep shit. Why he’s going to the one place he knows he ought not to, I couldn’t tell you. But then again, rarely anything Stackhouse does seems to make a lick of sense to me.

At Sookie’s house
Jessica meets a werewolf
JESSICA – Is it wrong of me to say how much fucking fun this night is? Bill and me workin’ together to kick some serious werewolf ass. What could be better?

Debbie huff and puffs…
ALCIDE – As different as they are, Sookie and Debbie have one thing in common. just when you think you know what they are capable of, they surprise the shit out of you. On V, both of them are stronger than most men. It gets them in way over their heads sometimes. They always come out of whatever it is, kicking, screaming, so two of ‘em face to face, tell you the truth…I don’t know which one of ‘em is making it out alive.

Bill feeds…on a werewolf
FYI – Werewolves working for Russell sometimes get cocky when fighting vampires. In their V-fueled stupors, they forget that they are the weaker creatures.

Russell wants to trade the red one for the blonde one
JESSICA – I know I’ve been saying this a lot these days, but fuck, am I in it now.

Russell throws Jessica to the wolf
ALCIDE – Now, like I said before, vamp versus wolf, vamp’s probably gonna win, just the way it is. One of God’s nasty little jokes. like skunks or the DMV. Gus is a fuckin’ idiot to think he’s gonna win that one. Russell knows it. I guess poor old Gus stopped being useful to Russell. I wonder how long it’s gonna be before Debbie stops being useful to his as well.

Silver spurs….like?
FYI – The silver spurs were a birthday gift from Talbot. They came with special gloves to allow Russell to put them on without singeing his own skin.

Sookie and Debbie duke it out
JESSICA – All right, there are werebitches and there are supreme werebitches, and Debbie is just about the strongest, meanest one of all. It’s like her whole body is on fire, like, all the time, and I hate her, of course, for hurting Sookie. But is it wrong that I also kind of worship her? There’s just something wild about her that I can’t put my finger on.

Sookie cuts Debbie…aims her shotgun
HINT – What is the dark, feral excitement in Sookie’s eyes?

At the Royal love den
Eric stakes Talbot
HINT – Eric’s revenge has begun…
FYI – Because Talbot is his progeny, Russell can feel him meeting the True Death. It is similar to the fear vibe makers get when their progeny is in trouble, but far more sharp in its initial assault. especially for Russell, who is not just Talbot’s maker, but his life partner.

In Sookie’s bedroom
Debbie dives out the window
Alcide – On one hand, I’m glad Sookie didn’t take Debbie down once and for all because I gotta believe the old Debbie is in there somewhere and might have a shot at coming back someday. On the other hand, Debbie ain’t never given up on anything. She’s gonna get back at me one way or the other. When she comes after Sookie again it’s gonna be to kill her.

A tearful Hoyt drives home
Jessica shows no mercy
JESICA – Okay, I love being sweet Jessica who loves sweet Hoyt and all that, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it feels really fucking good to sink your fangs into some jerk who tried to fuck with you. Because it does. Really, really good. When you’re in that moment…ripping someone to pieces like that, there ain’t anyone or anything left in the world. It’s the grossest, most awesome thing. Like, ever.

Episode 9 “Everything is Broken”
Transcribed by Osterby

At Fangtasia
Eric tell Pam he just killed Talbot
HINT – Eric has just opened a can of worms.

Nan stops in…but not for dinner
JESSICA – Okay. I admit I don’t know much about this side of the vampire world. All the laws and rules and the high-up politics. But I do know that Bill was punished for staking some loser named Longshadow…one of Eric’s disposable henchman. And by the way, we all know that punishment was turnin’ little old sweet Christian me into a vampire. So I can’t even imagine what kind of sentence they have in store for Eric for staking the husband of a king. I mean, look at that woman Nan and her backup team in their leather get-ups. It’s like some serious ninja shit. I am so glad that I am not Eric right now.

At the Royal residence
Russell finds Talbot goo
FYI – Russell and Talbot met at a costume ball in Constantinople over 700 years ago. Russell was dressed as Charlemagne. Talbot was Alexander the Great. The two fell in love, a first for Russell, and Talbot was more than happy to leave the Byzantine court behind and accompany him on his many military exploits.

At Sookie’s house
Sookie takes a shower
JESSICA – I spent my whole human life real neat…with not a hair out of place, napkin on my lap at every meal, blouse tucked in all the time. And now it seems I’m covered head to toe in blood more often than not. Being a vampire is a messy life. But tearing flesh open is just par for the course. I’m learning. It’s the blood and the mess that brings us closer to the people we wanna be closer too. It makes us feel more alive. And getting’ messy, well, that’s just the fun part. But I don’t think I can wear white anymore.

Sookie finds a dead Were
ALCIDE – Just like shifters and other weres…when werewolves fall asleep or get eviscerated by vamps…we turn back into our human form. It’s how we were all born after all. I guess you could call it our default setting.

Sookie and Bill discuss “normal couples”
JESSICA – Normal couple? Sookie knows she is never gonna have it normal with Bill. Truth is, I don’t even know what normal is because I never had a relationship before I was made vampire. But I think normal couples watch reality TV shows together and go to the mall and-–I don’t know, try on sunglasses at the Sunglass Hut. And it all just sounds really fucking boring, if you ask me. And if you ask Sookie, I bet she’d say the same thing.

At Lala’s house
Lala’s and Jesus discuss exit stratagies
FYI – Lafayette will say almost anything to get a man to leave before daybreak. He once made Tara come over and pretend to be his drunken ex-wife, ranting madly about their recent custody battle over their seven children, but normally, a few STD references have men running for the door in no time.

Lala compliments Jesus’ ink
FYI – The jaguar, hstorically a symbol of strength and power, also has spiritual connections to several cultures. Mayans believed they were their spiritual companions and could be conduits between the living and the dead. Aztecs thought them to be warriors, even naming their elite warrior class Jaguar Knights. In Brazil, they honored the jaguar’s physical body, its fat in particular because they believed it gave them courage.

At Jason’s house
Felton comes to take Crystal back
ANDY – Oh, shit. I do not see this ending well for Jason. He is clearly in some kind of situation he don’t know the first thing about. Crystal is afraid of her people. And if she’s afraid, I’m thinkin’ he should be too. But we all know Stackhouse doesn’t have the sense to be afraid.

Crystal wants rope, trust her, rope, for Felton
HINT – Why don’t handcuffs work?

At Fangtasia
Nan can’t get answers from Ginger, the shrieking fang cushion
JESSICA – Glamouring is one of my favorite tricks we got as vampires and well, it’s kind of the only one I know how to use. But if you use it too much on someone, they can end up like Ginger…or those girls who did too many whippits behind the Blockbuster. Their brains never quite work the same again. I could even tell with that guy Chip. He was, you know, a little dumber after I glamoured him.

Smile Eric, your on web cam
JESSICA – I can’t tell who does what here, but I think the Magister was, like, the Supreme Court for The Authority. He decides all the punishments, and Nan’s like the guy who stands up an speaks for the president in front of all those reporters when bad happens to America. And now the Supreme Court is gone…Nan has to dial direct to The Authority to get Eric’s punishment. But, uh, what’s The Authority? Um, I’m guessin’ it’s the Jews. That Christian America speaker who came to church camp that one time said they secretly run everything.

At Sam’s trailer
Sam advises Tara to speak to someone professional
ANDY – Sam and Tara always been good friends. I know there was something more there for a while, but now, it seems like they both just want the same thing from each other. Someone else who’s seen dark times and someone they can talk to and trust. I don’t know if they’re meant to be more than that. Stranger things have happened. I wonder if she knows what he is. Changing into animals and whatnot.

Sam gets a call from Terry
ANDY – I don’t know how much Sam makes off of those apartments he rents, but I bet it ain’t worth the trouble his tenants cause. On top of Dawn getting murdered there, there’s been break-ins, a fire, one of Arlene’s ex-husbands shot his TV, a hooker even operated out of there for a week…I heard.

At Fangtasia
Eric testifies on web cam
FYI – Throughout history, Russell has aligned himself with the most powerful men and women of any given epoch. He is particularly attracted to times of great upheaval: wars, revolutions, and epidemics. He often hired himself out to military leaders across the world to help the fates of many well-known battles. It was after World War II that Russell moved to Mississippi and began his slow and steady ascent up the North America vampire political ladder.

“Fuck the authority,” Russell’s words, verbatim
FYI – The American Vampire League claims to be the organizing force in vampire law. The AVL lobbies in Washington for vampires rights and, maintains a politically correct image for vampires everywhere. However, the AVL is not its own governing body. It is funded by and answers to The Authority, the true reigning power over all vampires. So little is known about The Authority that humans are not even aware of its existence.

Nan puts Eric and Pam on lock down, while the Authority considers Eric’s remarks
JESSICA – All I know about the VRA is that a lot of vampires wanted to pass it because it’s the right thing. That sounds a lot like the way my daddy used to talk about how gays shouldn’t get married or be able to have abortions. When I would ask him why, he’d just say, “Because it’s the right thing.” Then he’d go off about Jesus. And I kind of just tuned that stuff out. They were gonna tell me what I could and couldn’t do anyways, so, what does it matter what the government says?

At Tommy’s apartment
Sam interrupts Tommy’s naked party with “Nicole”
NATALIE CHAYETTE was born in Texarkana, Arkansas. Her father was a border cop and spent his life deporting people searching for a better life. Natalie herself sought a better life as a jazz singer in New Orleans. However, she arrived in the big Easy just three months shy of Hurricane Katrina. She has been living in Shreveport, working as a cocktail waitress ever since.

Along side of a road
Crystal ties Felton up like a Christmas ham
HINT – How did Crystal learn to tie someone up like this?

At Lala’s house
Nothin’ will get her when Ruby Jean has on her war paint
HINT – Why’s is Ruby Jean so perceptive with Lafayette?

At the Bon Temps Police Station
Rosie cries over the only man she ever loved
ANDY – I will admit that I did not see that one coming: Jason having a good sound theory about our perp. That boy does have some sense with police work. Not that I think he’s got the right intent. He’s clearly still up to no good with that Crystal girl, but if his ding-dong is gonna help me solve crime, so be it. It’s about time that thing did something good for someone else.

Jason tips off Andy about Hotshot
FYI – FBI: Federal Bureau of Investigation, DEA: Drug Enforcement Administration, ATF: Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives, DOJ: Department of Justice, Blackwater: A private military company

At Sookie’s house
Hadley calling
FYI – The Monroe Aquarium was a favorite childhood spot for Hadley and Sookie. Once a year, Gran would dress them uo in their party dresses and take them to watch the sea otters. Then they would visit an antebellum home that has been converted into a restaurant. Both Sookie and Hadley looked forward to this ritual, as did Gran.

At the aquarium
Hadley admits that she tipped off Sophie Anne about Sookie
FYI – Hadley has gone out of her way to hide her son’s existence and gift from Queen Sophie Anne.

Aunt Sookie meets Hunter
HUNTER HALE – Hadley’s six-year-old son, Hunter, was conceived during Hadley’s first stint in rehab. Hunter’s father, Troy, a recovering drug-addict, has had full custody of him since Hadley fell off the wagon.

Sookie and Hunter don’t need to talk
FYI – As a child Sookie was very much like Hunter. She was often quiet, overwhelmed by the sea of other people’s thoughts.

Sookie tells Hunter he doesn’t need to be scared
FYI – Is Hunter Sookie’s only living relative to share her gift? Why doesn’t Hadley have the same capabilities?

Where is Hadley taking Hunter
FYI – Is Hadley trying to take Hunter back to school before his absence is noticed?

At Merlotte’s
What? Arlene gets a $2 tip from 4 Daughter’s of the Confederacy with French manicures
TOMMY – Jesus, just because I’m the new guy with trashy folks who likes to have a little fun suddenly I’m suspect number one for everything that happens bad around here. Sam might be able to give me a life out of the ring but at least my folks accepted me for me. And there wasn’t all these rules. I don’t know about Bon Temps. I might need a change of location soon if this shit keeps up.

Arlene tells Holly that her baby isn’t Terry’s
HINT – Why does everyone seem to be confiding in Holly?

In Fairyland
Bill walks on water
FYI – Bill got here even though he wasn’t invited.

Claudine warns Bill to stay away from Sookie
FLASHBACK to the times Sooie has been protected: The chain at the Rattray attack, when Sookie light fingered Maryann and at Alcides apartment when Russell followed Bill to get Sookie

Bill tells Claudine he needs to know what Sookie is so he can protect her
JESSICA – Everyone is so obsessed with what Sookie is. And I get that she’s got some special powers, but at this point, who doesn’t? I love her because she’s been good to me, not because light shoots out of her fingers. And I think vampires as old as Russell and Eric need to quit treating Sookie like she’s some kind of sport and find a new hobby.

In Eric’s office at Fangtasia
Eric shares his pain with Pam
JESSICA – I’m real glad that Bill’s not a complete dickhead like Eric. And I’m also real glad Bill and I don’t have that weird sexual openness with each other like Eric and Pam do…because that would feel all statutory rapey. But I will say, there are things about Eric and Pam’s relationship that seem real nice. They know each other so, well, they don’t have to say stuff to know what’s going on with each other. And they got each other’s back. No matter what.

Eric tells Pam she must make a new vampire if he meets the True Death
HINT – Now that Eric is potentially facing the end, he wants to make sure Pam will have a companion and child to carry on both her own and Eric’s legacy.

At Merlotte’s
Table for 2? Hoyt would like Jessica to meet Summer
JESSICA – Seriously. Of all the times for my fangs to come out…it has to be in front of that stupid little antique-doll-buying freak. [SIGHS] Pretty much never been more embarrassed in my entire life. And seeing how as the last few weeks have been nothing but awkward and embarrassing moments, that’s really saying something. But doesn’t Hoyt see? She’s just a younger version of his mother.

Jason informs Crystal that Hotshot is goin’ down
ANDY – If Jason’s right and that V does connect back to Hotshot…then I am calling in the big boys. Now that I am sheriff, I cannot afford to have a drug bust go bad. Who Knows? I might want to run for office some day.

Jesus…Lala’s hero or miracle?
HINT – The connection between Lafayette and Jesus is based on something deeper than Lafayette knows.

Summer tells Hoyt to guard her dolls
ANDY – I know a thing or two about antiqin.’ My mama and sister are all into it. And let me tell you, it’s boring. Even when you do have the money to buy all the right stuff and study its origins and all that bullshit. I know Hoyt don’t like it anymore than I do…but that little old girl’s leading him around every bit as bad as his mother did. Hope she’s making it worth his while.

Hoyt tells Jessica he hates Summer
JESSICA – Well, I know I can trust my instincts. He did bring her around to make me jealous. He still loves me. Even though I’ve treated him so bad. Does that make me even more terrible for wanting him to still love me? Why does this have to be so complicated?

At Fangtasia
Mercedes…the stylish ride of the V-Feds
HINT – These vampire guards need sleep, as all vampires do, but they have built up a significant tolerance to exhaustion and suffer the bleeds far less than the average vampire.

Russell swears revenge to a Talbot’s goo
JESSICA – As disgusting as it is that Russell Edgington is carrying around Talbot’s goo in an urn…and trust me, it is nasty, I kind of get it. What else are you supposed to do if the one you love ends up, like, blood barf? Everyone knows you need some kind of remains to grieve. Like the widows of 9/11. Just finding a cufflink or a wedding ring among the rubble helped them move on. I know that from Oprah. So I’m gonna give Russell a free pass on that one. Even if he is a total fuckin’ psycho.
FYI – Like all powerful vampires, Russell has had to deal with public relations issues. Historically, he has placated Nan, pretending to respect the AVL and donating large sums of money in the name of vampire rights.

Nan hands a political tar-baby to Eric
JESSICA – I have no idea how Eric is gonna pull off killing Russell without anyone helping him. It’s like Nan basically told him to get ready to die. He actually looks scared. For, like, the first time ever. I almost feel bad for him. Oh, shit, I thought it was a bad sign…that Franklin didn’t turn to goo when Tara beat the crap out of him. I was a little worried he might come back. Although, all I can say is that now, once and for all…Tara is free of that psycho, and I can get to glamouring her.

Nan gives Eric an assignment: Bring her Russell’s fangs or she’ll have Eric’s
FYI – One of the more cruel ways to kill a vampire is to defang him before showing him the True Death. It leaves said vampire to die without dignity or much of a change to fight back.

At Merlotte’s
Calvin storms in to take back Crystal
FYI – When T-Dub went to his arraignment, he was able to get his family the message that Crystal snitched on everyone in Hotshot through his court-appointed attorney.

Sam attacks Calvin
TOMMY – All right, now I’m seeing some Mickens blood in Sam. Finally stopped taking everyone’s shit and gave it to that old guy who smells like cat piss. I reckon Sam started hiding who he was a long time ago and little by little became a big old doormat for everyone to shit on. Now that I’m here, showing him how to take the bull by the horns, he’s getting’ his juice back. Now, that is a man I’m proud to call my brother.

Lala amd Jesus load up Calvin to take him to the ER
ANDY – It’s a good thing that Jesus fella knows someone at the ER because it’s the only trauma ward for 100 miles. And on any given night, there are a thousand drunk guys who look just like Calvin waiting to get sewn up. I’ve seen guys flatline in the waiting room, and there ain’t any doctors to even try to revive them. It ain’t pretty, and I reckon Calvin is gonna need a lot of care after what Sam just did to him.

Jason takes aim at Frankin in the parking lot
ANDY – I read on the Internet how wooden bullets are the only things will kill a vampire. And you gotta hit the heart for that to work. I guess now that I’m sheriff, I ought to stock up on some…just to be prepared.

Ready, aim, fire….goo
JESSICA – Awe, shit, I thought it was a bad sign that Franklin didn’t turn to goo when Tara beat the crap out of him. I was a little worried he might come back, though all I can says is that, now once and for all, Tara is free of that psycho and I can get to glamouring her.

At Jason’t house
Bill tells Sookie he know what she is
JESSICA – I know I said before that I didn’t care about what Sookie is. But now that Bill knows…I’m getting’ super curious. I mean, wow, wouldn’t that be cool…if she had, like, a whole other set of powers that we could use to get what we want?

In Ms. Flanagan’s limo
Nan has a snack
ZANDRA TANUCCHI – Nan’s human pet and a three-time Playboy centerfold of the year. She became Nan’s full-time escort seven months ago and swears she will never go back to men or humans.

In the TBBN News room
Spineless human newscaster…
ANDY – Oh, Shit. This is not gonna be good for my workload.

Russell’s rant
JESSICA – Fuck! This is not gonna be good for the Vampire Rights Amendment. Nan thought she had it bad when Eric killed Talbot. But this tops everything. I don’t think they’ll ever let vampires out of the house again. Great. Now it’s just like being back home again, grounded for life.

Episode 10 “I Smell a Rat”
Transcribed by Anna

Sookie’s
FYI – Ellylon is derivative of Welsh; Las Anjanasa are typical faeries of Cantabria; and The Old People refers to the belief that faeries lived on Earth long before mankind.
FYI – Sookie will someday find out why the faes bred with humans against their wills.
HINT – What other gifts beyond hearing peoples’ thought might the faes possess?

Merlotte’s Parking Lot
ANDY – Just when you think Jason couldn’t possibly screw up more, he takes it to a whole other level. Like shooting a guy outside Merlotte’s ain’t bad enough, he’s got to go vigilante on a vampire too. It’s like he’s got a real skill for digging himself a hole so big he ain’t got a prayer of climbing out. Good thing he’s got Tara with him, getting him to cover his tracks. I don’t know how many times that boy’s going to get by the skin of his teeth. Good thing he’s so dang pretty.

Lafayette’s Porch
ANDY – I love living in a small town. Even though people get in everyone’s business, a town like Bon Temps takes care of its own. Only real thing we’re missing is a hospital close enough for when emergencies get too big to handle, and with the way things have been going lately, seems like we could keep a good size hospital busy 24-7.

Sam’s Flashback to 2003
CHARLENE – Charlene learned one thing growing up in Omaha, Nebraska: that good looks can get you just about anywhere. She’s made an entire career of scamming people using her sweet smile and everyone else’s underestimation of her.
JON RUTLEY was born in the dregs of Kansas City, Missouri to a motel housekeeper and a father he never met. When he failed out of 10th grade, he used his street smarts to scam a decent living out of whomever showed him the least bit of generosity. He’s never settled down in any city or any relationship long enough to get attached or caught. He took up with Charlene because she seemed hot and smart enough to keep up with his scheming.

Jason’s
JESSICA – First werewolves now fairies, fucking awesome. When I was 8 years old I asked my parents if we could go to the Halloween haunt down on Sugar Street and of course they said no ‘cos they’re like total buzz-kills, but I got all dressed up like a fairy anyway with these big ol’ pink wings and a wand made out of like a toilet paper role and cotton balls, and I waved it at Eden and told her it would make her disappear to somewhere like Disneyworld or the go-cart track. But something tells me the fairies Bill’s talking about, they aren’t like my ideas of fairies at all. I can’t wait for him to come back from Jason’s so I can ask him like 7 million questions about them.

Fangtasia
FYI – Russell Edgington is, so far, the oldest and strongest vampire we’ve met.
FYI – After the Great Revelation, several law firms started popping up around the world specializing in representing vampires and vampire rights. Although a last will and testament is a rarity in the vampire world, it is not unheard of.
JESSICA – So cool! I didn’t know vampires had wills. You think that means Bill has one too? I wonder if I’d be in it. If I get like his big ol’ house or a car or a pile of money or somethin’. Now don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I want anything bad to happen to Bill. It’s just like, I just got him back, so I want him to stick around for like ever, but… vampires get themselves in a whole lot of danger, and you never know. Lately Bill seems to be getting into more trouble than even I can keep track of.
FYI – Although nobody knows the full extent of Eric’s estate, it is no secret that it includes Fangtasia, several ornate caskets, and multiple properties in and around the United States and Sweden.

Lafayette’s Porch
HINT – Why does Lafayette feel so guilty about Calvin potentially dying, and why does he feel compelled to make it right?
HINT – Jesus is fascinated by how quickly Calvin heals; he’s never seen anything like this in his work as a nurse.
FYI – How does Crystal’s decision to leave Calvin and Hotshot compromise the Norris bloodline?

The woods near Jason’s
FLASHBACK – See how Sookie’s blood allowed Bill to be in the sun. (S1 graveyard scene, S3 Bill being thrown out of the truck).
HINT – Why is Bill not telling Sookie the entire truth?

Merlotte’s
JESSICA – Mom and Daddy used to watch Steve Newlin on the TV when he was talking about how evil vampires are, and they always thought he spoke a word of God like nobody else. I just thought his hair looked ridiculous and he’d talk kinda funny like his words were always mixed up, and he waved his Bible so much people got distracted and didn’t even notice. If I ever meet him, I think I’d tell him he should spend more time reading the Bible than talking so much crap about it ‘cos he’s got it all wrong, like 90% of the time. Then I’d tell him to go to a hairdresser. For somebody who’s on TV that much, he should maybe spend a little more than 12 bucks on a hairdo.

JESSICA – I wish Arlene would just cut it out and realise that vampires aren’t all evil; but I guess you can understand where she’s coming from she’s had it pretty rough in her life so far with Rene and all. He was a human and he turned out evil so you can imagine what she’s thinking a vampire could do. So you can be mad at her and so frustrated that you do stupid things like I just did in the heat of the moment ‘n all but, truth is, underneath it all you just feel kinda sorry for her…I’m going to have to make a big ol’ apology for scaring the crap out of her like that.

Hoyt & Summer in his truck
Jessica – I’ve heard having sex with a vampire is like a million times different than with a human, but I wouldn’t know. Hoyt’s my first, and he didn’t seem scared or nothing by it, not even when I told him…it grew back. He just made me feel like I’m the most special vampire in the world, and the idea of him being with another girl, human or vampire…of him sharing something special like what we shared…That’s unimaginable, and why’s she calling him bear? He’s so not a bear.

Jason’s
FYI – Jason has experience with a gun. Especially when it comes to shooting someone between the eyes.

Lafayette’s
HINT – Lafayette, who is rarely shy about taking drugs, is significantly reluctant to do V with Jesus.
JESUS – As a nurse, Jesus looks after many patients who do not exhibit “normal” behaviors. He’s intuitive in his abilities to care for people who do not necessarily believe in the same reality that most humans do.

Merlotte’s
FYI – “Hair of the dog” is short for the expression “hair of the dog that bit you.” It’s a reference to the irony that sometimes the cure for a hangover is to drink more alcohol. He [Tommy] is also making a play on words because they are, unbeknownst to those around him, both able to shift into dogs.
FYI – A Wiccan practices Wicca, a Neopagan religion and a form of modern witchcraft.
TOMMY – I meant it when I said I was proud of my big brother. He’s been all tough talk but no action, and for once he walked his own walk, and I thought — fucking awesome. I finally believed in him, that he had a past as fucked up as he kept saying, and it was the first time I actually thought, you know, he had something to teach me. But it turns out he ain’t a pussy, he’s just a dick. Talk about a buzz-kill.

Behind Merlotte’s
ANDY – I ain’t never thought what would happen if a serial killer made a baby and if it would grow up like his daddy. All I know is the last thing on earth this town needs is another Rene Lanier. I sure do hope my cousin Terry ain’t going to end up playing daddy to some future Ted Bundy.

Jason’s
ANDY – After all I’ve done to cover our asses with the cops and this whole damn town, after all the talks we had about being Old Jason and sticking to what he knows, he blows it all in one shot by being a cry baby to his kid sister. I tell ya, this is 100% proof there ain’t nothing in that head of his except scrambled eggs and a side of stupid.

Jesus & Lafayette’s V Trip
ANGEL AND ROSI MORALES have dreamt of expanding their family since before they were married. They grew up next door to each other and fell in love before they had reached their teens. They decided very early on they would have at least three children. When Rosi began having difficulty conceiving, they were told to visit Cecilia, an expert with women who had fertility problems.

Jason’s
JESSICA – I don’t care how many dreams I’d have about Eric, I’d still know you can’t trust him. It’s the blood talking I bet, confusing her into thinking she’s got real feelings…unless maybe she does. What do I know? But man that would suck for Bill. I don’t know if blood actually wears off, and then you stop dreaming about a vampire. Bill never got around to telling me that part, but in Sookie’s case I sure hope it does, for her sake and for Bill’s.
FLASHBACK – See how Jason used to protect Tara when they were kids.
ANDY – Leave it to Stackhouse to one up himself. This is beyond dumb. This is dangerous, telling his sister’s one thing. Sure she’d go off on him about killing someone, but it’s not like she’s going to go rat him out. She cares too much to do that, but Tara, after everything she’s gone through in her life, who knows how the hell she’s going to react. Ain’t nothing good’s going to come of this I can tell you that, and it ain’t just about my own ass being on the line. Truth is I feel for her; I really do and what happened was just…All I’m saying is she’s be better off not knowing what really happened, but Jason just went ahead and blew it for all of us.

Bill’s Front Yard
FYI – The KKK has a history of burning crosses on the lawns of those they deemed undesirable.
JESSICA – I get it. Bill wants us to mainstream. We’re not supposed to go all vampire on people, and it’s one thing when we’re talking about feeding on people versus downing a bottle of nasty Tru Blood, but this is like completely different. If someone throws a brick through your window and burns crosses on your lawn, you hunt them down. It’s that simple. Now I’m not saying you drain them and tear them apart. Lord knows I’ve done enough of that lately, but you at least scare the living crap out of them. I mean, it’s great having Bill back ‘n all, but I just wish he’d let me go after those fuckers like I did the werewolves. That was so fucking gross and…awesome.

2003 Flashback in the woods
HINT – Sam has alluded several times to dark things he’s done in his past.
FLASHBACK – See another woman that discovered Sam barks in his sleep (Tara).

In the woods near Merlotte’s
HINT – This is where Sam buried Charlene and Jon.

Fangtasia
HINT – This is not a dream.
HINT – Eric seems to genuinely care about Sookie.
JESSICA – There’s a lot I don’t know about being a vampire, clearly, but one thing I do know is that I’d do just about anything for Bill if it really came down to it. Granted I have like no idea why. I don’t really know the guy, but it’s like he’s got some pull on me I can’t undo. I think the bond between a vampire and their maker is just one of those things, you know, like gravity. It exists, but…don’t really make no sense.

Merlotte’s
TOMMY – Fucking Hoyt Fortenberry. I thought I hated that piece of crap before but now, phhh. Look, I know he’s all tall and got good hair ‘n does this whole sweeter than sugar routine…but some day Jess is goin’ to realise she needs to wise up and find herself a real man, someone who sees her dark and finds it hot as shit…not scary. He’s all talk now, but I bet you the second he hears who she really is, he’s goin’ to run like the wind, and I’m goin’ to be right there laughing my ass off. Then making my move.
JESSICA – Sometimes I think it’d be easier if Hoyt was darker and more dangerous. Then I wouldn’t be so scared to be so dark too, but then he wouldn’t be Hoyt, Sweet Hoyt with a heart as big as …I don’t even know what’s that big honestly…All I know is I love him. I really love him, ‘n nothing’s going to change that; and if I don’t tell him, if I stay all scared the rest of my life and don’t tell him how I feel, I’m goin’ to regret it. And I got a whole hundred lifetimes ahead of me, and that is too damn long to wish you’d said something when you had the chance.
FYI – In a fight between Hoyt and Tommy, Hoyt could use his size to throw a few strong punches. But if Tommy shifts? Hoyt doesn’t stand a chance.
JESSICA – When you see the person you love getting hurt and you can stop it, then you do. I don’t even know what the hell that dog was doing pulling Hoyt apart like that, but boy am I glad I know how to put him back together…
JESSICA – I never imagined someone would drink my blood, and I’d actually be able to feel from them like… the inside out. I wasn’t even thinking of that in the moment. I just saw Hoyt’s arm all bloody and torn up, and I… I just wanted to do whatever I could to make his hurt disappear. It’s pretty amazing, being able to save the man you love when he needs you. And don’t get me wrong, it’s scary to be so close to someone that you can sense them in your whole body, but a good scary I think, after all, it’s Hoyt.

Jason’s
FLASHBACK – See the last time Jason had an encounter with a werepanther. (Jason in woods after killing Eggs)
FYI – Crystal and her family are werepanthers.

Tony’s room
TONY was born in Atlanta, Georgia to a family of failed gangsters. After coming out at the age of 15, his parents kicked him out of the house and disowned him. He soon realized he didn’t have any legitimate skills to fall back on. He spent the first few years floating from restaurant to restaurant, doing dishes and mopping floors. He eventually started working the streets and found it far more lucrative than any other job he could find.
FYI – Russell never loved anyone during his life as a human and then as a vampire, but when he met Talbot, he fell in love for the first time. He felt at ease, comfortable, and happy when the two were alone together. He knew Talbot honored him as his maker, but Russell wanted Talbot to love him of his own free will. It was a constant struggle for Russell, and Talbot took extraordinary care of their home as a way to prove to Russell that his love was true.
HINT – Russell is so wracked with grief, he seems to have broken with reality.

Fangtasia
JESSICA – All I know is when Bill finds out about Sookie and that dungeon–and he will fast–it’s gonna get bloody and fast, and tell you the truth, I don’t know who’s going to make it out alive.
FYI – While Sookie is fuelled by vampire blood and vitriol for Eric, the odds of her escaping those shackles in the Fangtasia basement are slim to none.

Episode 11 “Fresh Blood”
Transcribed by Osterby

Episode 12 “Evil is Going On”
Transcribed by Anna

Fangtasia
JESSICA – Well I guess that’s the whole vampires-are-immortal thing ain’t exactly true. You can get staked and turned into goo. You can get drained and shrivel into a raisin, and apparently you can go walking into the sun and fry up ‘til you’re nothing but flakes of ash, slower if you’ve had fairy blood. But still, I think if I have to go I’d want to meet the sun, like Godric. I don’t know like exactly what I believe in as far as after afterlife goes, but I’d rather find out facing the sun than the sharp end of a wooden stake.
JESSICA – Told ya, I’m not sure if it’s just the blood talking or something else, but Sookie feels something for Eric, enough to make her run out and try to save him even after he chained her to a wheel in his basement and used her as bait. And you don’t just, like, get over that and forget it and try to save the person if you don’t give a shit about them. And I thought my feelings for Hoyt were complicated.
HINT – Is it possible that Sookie’s emotions have an impact on whether or not her powers can be used?
FYI – If a vampire is too weak, he is unable to drop fang in order to feed.

Sam’s
FLASHBACK – See the last time Nan and Steve were on TV together. (2.01)
FYI – Sam’s adoptive mother may not have been able to handle Sam being a dog, but she could cook up a storm. There isn’t much Sam looks back on fondly about his childhood, but the smell of his mother’s buttermilk pancakes could make anyone salivate.
ANDY – I always liked Sam Merlotte, even if he ain’t from around these parts. But then not too long ago I found out he can turn into animals. Yeah,  I know. The fuck– as if vampires ain’t enough. I still like Sam though–even if I have seen him naked enough times to make me feel weird around him.

Fangtasia
JESSICA – There’s insane, and then there’s Eric Northman right now. I don’t know what in God’s name he thinks he’s doing, but it’s like he’s got some crazy death wish or something. I used to think he was one of the smartest vampires alive, but to do this just seems like insanity…or suicide.

Sam’s
TOMMY – Any shifter knows you can’t really leave your past behind you. It always catches up. What’s fucked up about you is in you, and you’re always goin’ to reach that moment when you have to tell people what you really are or run like hell from ‘em. I chose running, easier that way and Sam knows that better than anyone, even though he pretends sometimes not to.
FYI – Sam seems to speak from experience when he implies that you can reinvent your life.

Fangtasia
HINT – Who did Eric just call?

Police Headquarters
SERGEANT MITCH COBURN grew up in a military family, convinced he would follow his father and grandfather’s footsteps in the Marine Corps. When flat feet prevented him from joining the armed forces, he pursued the DEA and has successfully climbed up the ranks.
ANDY – I’ll say it here and nowhere else: these DEA people Piss Me Off. It’s like they think I’m some red-neck doofus. I am acting sheriff, and I get that they have their rules and it is a drug raid, but it  wouldn’t kill anybody to have a little faith I can get the job done.  Course I keep my mouth shut about it and tell them everything I know and back ‘em up best they let me, but in my head, I’m popping this rooster Coburn right in the face and, boy, does it feel good!
ANDY – Godammit, just when I thought Stackhouse was goin’ to turn out to be useful for once, he’s going to go and fuck it up. I just know it. I feel for that girl Crystal, but Hotshot’s got to go down! I don’t want another Waco neither, but something’s gotta give. It ain’t all right for meth and V dealing scumbags to get to do whatever they want just ‘cos some pretty damsel in distress stole Jason’s heart.

Road works
MR. RAKESTRAW graduated from Bon Temps High School and thought he wanted nothing more than to return there to live out the rest of his life, but now that he’s living his dream? He needs a little dose of rum to get him through the day
ANDY – My sister Portia loves that show on TV about the interventions. Had more than one of them for me back when I was on the sauce, but when she read her letter to me it said, basically: “Dear Andy your embarrassing me, quit it!” Grandamma’s was even worse: “You’re a Bellefleur for Christ’s sake, stop making a spectacle of yourself.” You’d think now that I’m sober and sheriff they’d show me a little respect…When hell freezes over.

Merlotte’s
HINT – The V-trip Lafayette had with Jesus seems to have tapped into some of the power to which Ruby Jean was referring to. Is Lafayette picking up on people’s energy or their past?

Fangtasia
JESSICA – I thought Eric was sneakier than a snake in the grass, but Russell Edgington could put him to shame. All I know is, it’s a good thing Sookie’s so smart or else they’d all be in a heap of trouble not even Eric and Bill could get out of.
FYI – Paradise (old Persian: Pairidaeza) refers to a place where everything in it and surrounding it is considered peaceful and timeless.  Arcadia derives from Greek and Latin names: Arcadia/Arkados. The world has become synonymous, over time, with “utopia.” Nirvana, literally translated as “blowing out.” This is in reference to Buddhist beliefs that nirvana is the eradication of the fires of hatred and greed.
HINT – Translation of what Russell’s says to Sookie: Stop! I’m warning you! I will rip your heart out, you little whore!
JESSICA – Eww! Gross! All right I thought that a dead trucker in a cubby hole was nasty, but watching dead vampire goo swirl around down the garbage disposal is worse. Ooh!

Hotshot
ANDY – If there’s one thing you can count on with Jason Stackhouse, it’s that you can’t count on him for anything. Even when he does something right he screws it up before any good can come of it, especially in regards to being a cop. I swear if he blows this thing and makes me look stupid in front of these guys, I will whoop that boy’s ass so hard it’ll come out of his ears for weeks.
FYI – Because of Hotshot’s relatively insular existence, no one knows the time frame of its origins.
FYI – If Calvin were to have children with his sister, they would be both his children and his nieces and nephews; therefore, he’d be both an uncle and father to them.
FYI – Nobody else in Hotshot knew that Felton was taking V, or that his habit was getting worse by the day.

Outside Terry’s
TOMMY – Yeah, an apology–after the way he humiliated me? Uh-uh. Too little, too late. I don’t need him, I don’t need anyone.

Sheriff’s
ANDY – You know what? Fuck Coburn! Don’t tell him I said that, but yeah – fuck him! If he had any idea what we’ve dealt with in this town, what I’ve dealt with in this town, he wouldn’t doubt me, not for a second. I’d like to see him deal with a god dam maenad.

Hotshot
ANDY – Ever heard the term being one-eyed in the valley of the blind? That’d be Jason Stackhouse in charge of them poor folks in Hotshot. They got nothing, and Jason can barely take care of himself, so I don’t know how he’s going to make this right for anyone. Then again, the one thing Jason does right is look after people, and for the most part, he gets that right, when he’s not screwing up royally, of course.
FYI – What lies in the future for Jason and the werepanthers of Hotshot?

Lettie Mae’s
FYI – No one knows exactly when Lettie Mae and the Reverend Daniels began having a romantic relationship. However, they’ve been having long conversations over the punch bowl at the weekly community gathering, and he has been spotted sneaking into her house for the last week or so.
ANDY – I ain’t a gossip, so I won’t go spreading rumors about Reverend Daniels and Lettie Mae. Lord knows I’d like to forget I even know what I know about them, but let’s just say Reverend Daniels is a family man and his family ain’t the Thorntons. Well, let’s just hope he remembers the sense the good Lord gave him, and he goes back to thumping the Bible, like he’s supposed to.
FYI – When Tara says to Lettie Mae “Don’t you want to change your life while you still have time?” is she referring to her mother or herself?
HINT – They both seem to realise this is goodbye.

Merlotte’s
TOMMY – I ain’t good at much, but I am good at figuring out how to scam people. I mean it’s practically the only thing mamma and Joe Lee taught me, and I ain’t letting my one good skill go to waste. I don’t care what Sam says, he don’t want me here anyway, and now he’ll get exactly what he wants – just like me.
HINT – This vision of Rene doesn’t seem to be just an after-effect of the V-trip anymore.
JESSICA – I barely know what’s happenin’ in my own body most of the time, let alone what’s going on through Lafayette’s brain. I got vampire blood in me, but it’s all I got in my actually. So I don’t know what it’s like to taste vampire blood, trip out on it like Lafayette and Jesus did, but I hear it takes whatever you are and just makes you…more. And Lafayette’s got more, more than anyone I know, so I can’t even imagine what happens when he’s on V. I bet he has the weirdest and most colorful dreams like, ever.

Fangtasia
ALCIDE – When I was called to help out Eric Northman again, first thing I thought was, “Are you fucking kidding? Haven’t I done enough?” And the second thought was, “I get to see Sookie again,” so I guess you can see which thought won out.
ALCIDE – God knows where Debbie is or if she’s alive even. Feel pretty shitty saying this about someone I once loved, but I hope she isn’t. Something tells me she is though. Something tells me that when I least expect it, she’s going to come after me. Well you know what Debbie? Bring it bitch.
FYI – Werewolves can shift on their own will any time, but during a full moon they have no choice in the matter and must change form.
HINT – Notice Bill put something in his pocket.
ALCIDE – I don’t know what’s going on between that vamp and Sookie, but I hope she comes to her senses. He still wants her though. You can see it; so does Eric. Man would be a fool to step into that…If she gave me another opening, I’d go after her in a heartbeat.

Andy’s office
ANDY – Hard to tell with Stackhouse, but I swear I caught a glimpse of him being, I don’t know, smarter…like he’s… thinking about somethin’ or someone other than himself. Course he’s in handcuffs. Leave it to Jason. If there’s trouble, he’ll find it, and if it ain’t there, he’ll stir some up on his own without even realizing it.

Merlotte’s
FYI – Is Ruby Jean really schizophrenic, or does she have a similar gift as Lafayette?
HINT – If it’s true that there are good witches and bad ones, which would Jesus be?

Sookie’s
HINT – Was it the mention of werewolves that made Tara leave, or was she just here to say goodbye?

Building site
ALCIDE – Somethin’ tells me the way things have been going these days with these vamps, Debbie wreaking havoc the way she did, I’m never goin’ to really be through with all this trouble. Something’s bound to rear its ugly head sometime. One good thing coming out of all of this has been meeting Sookie, even though she’s the one that brought me into this whole mess. I’d be lying if I said that I wouldn’t miss her.
JESSICA – A hundred years! Living under a pile of cement. No one to talk to; no one to eat. I swear I’d go bat-shit. There’d be no Hoyt either. I wouldn’t survive it; I couldn’t.
FLASHBACK – See the last time Eric called Rubin (At Fangtasia)

Hoyt’s house
JESSICA – Back when I was just a home school dweeb, spouting Bible verses, I’ never imagine I’d even kiss a boy, let alone fall in love with one. And now, Hoyt wants me to live with him just like a real couple, well maybe not totally real ‘cos he’s goin’ to have to make me a cubby hole and I like to drink my boyfriend, but I’m a vampire who chews her fingernails and has the sweetest guy in the whole world. Who’d ever thought I’d have to be dead before I got to have an honest-to-God real life.
HINT – Is this doll a harbinger of things to come or simply an item left behind by an old tenant?

Gun shop
ANDY – Since that vampire went on TV, ripping that news guy apart, there’s been an awful lot of new weapons popping up everywhere. Leave it to the good ol’ US of A to find yet another way to make a buck preying on the fears of ordinary folk. As if the police force they already got somehow doesn’t know how to put their own pants on straight, let alone protect them. Just what we need in this country, more idiots packing heat.

Sookie’s
JESSICA – I get that Bill means well and all, no doubt he loves her more than, like, anything on this planet or any other planet out there, but saying he’s going to keep her safe after everything that’s happened…If there’s anyone in the world who can protect Sookie like that, it’d be Bill, but even I know enough to think that’s a hell of an ambitious plan.
FLASHBACK – See the last time Sookie rescinded Bill’s invitation to her home. (1.11)

Tara driving off
HINT – Where could Tara be going?

Sam and Tommy
TOMMY – Somewhere in me, I guess I knew if I ran, Sam would find a way to track me down. He can track my scent from pretty far away, and I’m sure taking his money must have pissed him off good. Honestly, I know I like to pretend I know everything, but if you ask me how the hell this is goin’ to end up with me and Sam, I don’t have a clue in Hell. Guess I should’ve thought about that before I took off with his dough.

Sookie
HINT – Where could Sookie be going?

Bill’s
Jessica – Like I said, if anyone’s going to protect Sookie, my money’s on Bill but up against a queen that’s much older than him? It’s impossible. I honestly don’t know how he’s going to make it out alive. I haven’t been this scared since the first night I met Bill Compton, and you see how that turned out.